April 1, 2022

Dynamics


Once again I'm joined by Ian a.k.a TheFoolishSwarmi, this time to talk about the different kind of dynamics in D&D. Most of the episode is focused on the discussion of how D&D is inherently a human experience, and how realising this and efforts to make the game more humane can drastically improve the experience for all at the table, in a safe way. TTRPGs operate in a shared space, and just as every table is unique, every group of players is it's own organism.

Thank you to everyone who donated to my charity stream, together we made over £600!

  • 02:32 - How Group Dynamics Affects the Game
  • 25:16 - The Whole is Greater than the Sum of it's Parts
  • 38:06 - Party Dynamics and Social Intelligence
  • 49:18 - Building an Effective Character

Find Ian on:

Find Thinking Critically on:

References:

Patrons:

Intro Music: 'Local Forecast' by Kevin MacLeod
Intermission Music: 'Chill' by Kevin MacLeod
Outro Music: 'Local Forecast - Elevator' by Kevin MacLeod

Transcript

1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:06,080
welcome thinkers to season three episode

2
00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:07,919
23 of thinking critically today's topic

3
00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:10,880
is dynamics

4
00:00:07,919 --> 00:00:12,320
and before we begin another announcement

5
00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:14,799
for those of you who are regular

6
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:17,600
listeners of the show you'll know that

7
00:00:14,799 --> 00:00:19,840
last friday i did a charity stream for

8
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:22,720
the naomi house and jax place children's

9
00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:25,599
hospice here in the uk and it was a

10
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:28,160
resounding success we smashed the

11
00:00:25,599 --> 00:00:30,960
donation goal 117

12
00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:32,480
of the target over 600 pounds raised by

13
00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:34,399
everybody so

14
00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:36,640
firstly thank you to all those who tuned

15
00:00:34,399 --> 00:00:37,840
into the 12-hour charity stream it was a

16
00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:39,920
very

17
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:41,680
interesting experience

18
00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,879
and thank you to all those who have

19
00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:45,039
donated

20
00:00:42,879 --> 00:00:47,440
one of the donation rewards

21
00:00:45,039 --> 00:00:49,440
was a shout out at the show so now i'm

22
00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:50,559
going to go through all of those who

23
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:51,760
qualified

24
00:00:50,559 --> 00:00:55,680
thank you to

25
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:57,120
alexandra john russell dexterity martin

26
00:00:55,680 --> 00:01:00,960
ian zach

27
00:00:57,120 --> 00:01:04,400
leon damo zander timothy tom

28
00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:07,050
jacob david and john

29
00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:15,680
now on with the show

30
00:01:07,050 --> 00:01:15,700
[Music]

31
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:27,520
[Applause]

32
00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:27,520
[Music]

33
00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:34,079
and today i'm joined once more by the

34
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:36,159
foolish swami thank you ever so much for

35
00:01:34,079 --> 00:01:38,159
joining us can you tell us all again a

36
00:01:36,159 --> 00:01:40,079
little bit about yourself hi everyone

37
00:01:38,159 --> 00:01:42,240
i'm the foolish farmer my name is ian

38
00:01:40,079 --> 00:01:44,159
and i'm from belgium a european

39
00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:45,200
professional dungeon master and social

40
00:01:44,159 --> 00:01:46,720
worker

41
00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:48,159
i

42
00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:50,640
tend to

43
00:01:48,159 --> 00:01:52,960
mostly go for dnd whenever i play my

44
00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:54,960
games because it's the one i feel less

45
00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:57,280
restricted with and i'm mostly

46
00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:59,680
fascinated by the social aspects of

47
00:01:57,280 --> 00:02:01,920
dtrpgs and by

48
00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:04,320
the story styling aspect of it of course

49
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:05,840
and this is now your second i've had the

50
00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:08,879
pleasure of hosting you two times the

51
00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:11,680
first time was as we just discussed

52
00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:14,640
uh way longer ago than i'd care to admit

53
00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:15,520
back in season 1 episode 10 on

54
00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:18,160
a

55
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,440
on the topic called structure which is

56
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:21,920
as

57
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:22,800
obtuse and abstract as perhaps today's

58
00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:24,640
is

59
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:27,040
which brings me neatly on

60
00:02:24,640 --> 00:02:29,599
to today's topic which is

61
00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:31,920
dynamics so what does that mean to you

62
00:02:29,599 --> 00:02:33,440
in the d framework well i thought about

63
00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:34,480
it a little bit earlier today and i jot

64
00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,840
it down

65
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:37,599
just a few

66
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:39,200
words and i think

67
00:02:37,599 --> 00:02:41,599
the first thing that came into my mind

68
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:43,519
was group dynamics and then

69
00:02:41,599 --> 00:02:45,760
directly second after that was party

70
00:02:43,519 --> 00:02:47,760
dynamics because they're so close to

71
00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:49,040
each other and then the other two i

72
00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:51,200
thought about were game dynamics and

73
00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:53,120
story dynamics okay well remember that

74
00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:54,640
list because i will forget but let's

75
00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:56,160
let's go through it then so my first

76
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:57,280
question to you there

77
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:58,800
is

78
00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:00,640
how are you differentiating between

79
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:03,360
group and party so when you say grouper

80
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:04,959
do you mean the players yes all right

81
00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:06,879
that that sounds like it's going to be a

82
00:03:04,959 --> 00:03:08,319
meaty topic

83
00:03:06,879 --> 00:03:10,239
yeah the group for me is the players and

84
00:03:08,319 --> 00:03:11,200
the party is how the characters they

85
00:03:10,239 --> 00:03:13,920
play

86
00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:15,760
okay all right then so i am

87
00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:18,319
based off of what we discussed last time

88
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:20,959
and your your own personal areas of

89
00:03:18,319 --> 00:03:23,200
expertise irl i'm expecting this group

90
00:03:20,959 --> 00:03:25,840
dynamics one to have some

91
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:28,959
quite uh actually put this revealing and

92
00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:31,120
insightful thoughts way up outside of my

93
00:03:28,959 --> 00:03:33,120
area of expertise so uh

94
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:36,720
what are your thoughts on

95
00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:38,319
how the group dynamics then impacts the

96
00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:40,560
game

97
00:03:38,319 --> 00:03:43,519
well it hugely depends on which type of

98
00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:45,440
group you play with i often have a

99
00:03:43,519 --> 00:03:47,280
completely new group where even players

100
00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:49,920
who don't know themselves because a lot

101
00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:51,440
of the things i run are one shots

102
00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:52,959
that are kind of

103
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:55,200
free to join you don't need a pre-made

104
00:03:52,959 --> 00:03:57,280
party to join them so

105
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:59,120
i often have players who are new to the

106
00:03:57,280 --> 00:04:00,959
game or players who are new to the group

107
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:02,239
and that changes a lot on how you run

108
00:04:00,959 --> 00:04:04,159
your game

109
00:04:02,239 --> 00:04:05,599
because you want everybody to feel safe

110
00:04:04,159 --> 00:04:08,560
and welcome

111
00:04:05,599 --> 00:04:11,280
so one of the things i

112
00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:13,040
think about when i'm going towards a

113
00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:14,879
group is

114
00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:17,759
who are the people sitting at my table

115
00:04:14,879 --> 00:04:19,840
and i can usually pretty easily almost

116
00:04:17,759 --> 00:04:22,160
instantaneously know who i'm dealing

117
00:04:19,840 --> 00:04:24,160
with but one of the

118
00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:26,240
most important parts of that is having a

119
00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:28,960
shared or open space

120
00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:30,320
and there's a few things you can you can

121
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,800
implement to

122
00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:34,000
create that safe or open space but i

123
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:36,960
think the first thing you should

124
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:39,040
consider is the size of your group

125
00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:40,840
um because studies have shown

126
00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:42,880
that when we look

127
00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:44,560
towards the

128
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:46,800
different roles we take in groups

129
00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:48,400
especially when it comes to meetings

130
00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:50,400
professional meetings that it's

131
00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:53,360
important those roles can be shifted

132
00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:54,479
and that there's not always a very

133
00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:57,919
concise

134
00:04:54,479 --> 00:05:00,000
leader or concise notetaker for example

135
00:04:57,919 --> 00:05:02,560
and that the ideal size

136
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:04,720
for that participation is three to eight

137
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:06,800
people okay that's why i never go above

138
00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:08,160
eight and i

139
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:10,479
don't like

140
00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:12,400
running with two people

141
00:05:10,479 --> 00:05:14,400
except if it's something they've

142
00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:18,000
specifically asked like oh we want to be

143
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:19,759
just two people having a story together

144
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:21,759
we're just like a two-man party that's

145
00:05:19,759 --> 00:05:23,680
kind of just we want story-wise then

146
00:05:21,759 --> 00:05:26,320
that works perfectly but if you're

147
00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:28,160
getting new groups um

148
00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:29,840
what seems to work best is three to

149
00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:31,280
weight players i don't know how many

150
00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:33,759
players you have in your group

151
00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:34,720
a good good question a pertinent

152
00:05:33,759 --> 00:05:37,919
question

153
00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:39,919
as i had six before the holidays and now

154
00:05:37,919 --> 00:05:41,919
one guy is going on a

155
00:05:39,919 --> 00:05:43,759
indefinite hiatus for the time being so

156
00:05:41,919 --> 00:05:45,199
that's going down to five

157
00:05:43,759 --> 00:05:47,520
but um

158
00:05:45,199 --> 00:05:49,600
there's a few other changes regarding

159
00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:51,680
party dynamic that i wanted to go into

160
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:53,120
in the next bit but before we go on to

161
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,960
that i

162
00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:57,360
really really really like the idea of

163
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:59,039
bringing in the studies and the the

164
00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:00,800
academic

165
00:05:59,039 --> 00:06:02,880
side of

166
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:04,240
meetings and group group dynamics as you

167
00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:06,800
put it i can't there's no better word

168
00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:08,479
than to use the topic of the show

169
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:10,800
so yeah group dynamics and i'm a fool

170
00:06:08,479 --> 00:06:12,080
because i've been in like a professional

171
00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:14,080
career

172
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:16,400
which is full of meetings as i'm sure

173
00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:17,600
most people will know uh for

174
00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:20,000
the last

175
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:21,919
14 years of my life i've been in a

176
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:24,160
professional environment where you have

177
00:06:21,919 --> 00:06:26,319
meetings and never once

178
00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:28,639
in my dnd life has the thought crossed

179
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:32,000
like maybe i should think

180
00:06:28,639 --> 00:06:32,000
how the two things overlap

181
00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:37,199
and i i can i can absolutely see that

182
00:06:35,199 --> 00:06:38,479
being a very

183
00:06:37,199 --> 00:06:40,560
very

184
00:06:38,479 --> 00:06:42,160
interesting overlap there and like we

185
00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:44,639
have mentioned briefly on the show and

186
00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:46,560
in previous episodes around um

187
00:06:44,639 --> 00:06:48,720
kind of like tuckman's four-stage model

188
00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:50,400
of of group forming you know forming

189
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:52,319
storming norming and performing and that

190
00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:53,759
kind of stuff and that is also you know

191
00:06:52,319 --> 00:06:55,039
i studied that back at university a

192
00:06:53,759 --> 00:06:56,160
decade ago

193
00:06:55,039 --> 00:06:59,280
and

194
00:06:56,160 --> 00:07:03,199
that is very much applicable to

195
00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:04,400
a d d group both the players and the

196
00:07:03,199 --> 00:07:06,240
characters

197
00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:07,840
which is

198
00:07:06,240 --> 00:07:10,319
an interesting kind of

199
00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:12,560
way to think that there's in parallel

200
00:07:10,319 --> 00:07:14,560
there's two separate groups which are

201
00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:15,919
wrestling with their own dynamics

202
00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:16,720
some of which are impacted by the other

203
00:07:15,919 --> 00:07:18,000
ones

204
00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:20,960
i don't know how deep down that rabbit

205
00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:22,880
hole i want to start thinking because

206
00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:24,160
uh there's there's an awful lot there

207
00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:25,680
but um

208
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:27,520
yes no and well the other thing i wanted

209
00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:30,319
to mention was um

210
00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:31,360
what's good about today's show is that

211
00:07:30,319 --> 00:07:33,680
obviously

212
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:36,400
listeners will know that idm my main one

213
00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:38,960
campaign which is the same six slash

214
00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:40,720
five players now for two and a bit years

215
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:41,680
three years probably

216
00:07:40,720 --> 00:07:44,800
so

217
00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:46,639
you know contrast to yourself it's all

218
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:47,919
people i get very well with it's people

219
00:07:46,639 --> 00:07:49,520
i've

220
00:07:47,919 --> 00:07:51,680
been blackout drunk with it's you know

221
00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:53,840
i've had loads of social

222
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,720
times with them and stuff compared to

223
00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:57,120
how

224
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:59,440
what you do it's it's people you already

225
00:07:57,120 --> 00:08:02,240
feel safe with before you go onto the

226
00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:04,800
table indeed yeah like

227
00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:06,400
i yeah so i i can

228
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:08,240
i can't comment from experience in terms

229
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:09,599
of like

230
00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:12,240
an unsafe

231
00:08:09,599 --> 00:08:14,319
environment i'm maybe i'm perhaps i'm

232
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:16,240
fortunate that i've never been in a

233
00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:17,680
situation where i felt like that or

234
00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:19,520
certainly hope i'd never put anyone else

235
00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:21,120
in that thing but i'm pretty sure i

236
00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:22,720
haven't um

237
00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:24,319
but now as i said yeah six six players

238
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:26,240
down to five although one is still

239
00:08:24,319 --> 00:08:28,240
obviously in the group and lurking in

240
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:29,520
the in the chat and it's probably no

241
00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:31,199
doubt going to be

242
00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:33,519
having a severe case of fomo as the

243
00:08:31,199 --> 00:08:35,039
weeks go on but

244
00:08:33,519 --> 00:08:36,719
have you already had a first session

245
00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:38,080
without the sixth person it's it's

246
00:08:36,719 --> 00:08:39,039
tomorrow night

247
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:40,640
okay

248
00:08:39,039 --> 00:08:42,719
that time at time of recording it's

249
00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:44,880
literally 24 hours away almost to the

250
00:08:42,719 --> 00:08:46,399
hour well i would say try to pay close

251
00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,200
attention to

252
00:08:46,399 --> 00:08:49,360
how

253
00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:51,839
one person leaving the group affects the

254
00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:54,160
group dynamic because that person will

255
00:08:51,839 --> 00:08:56,720
definitely have some few roles that he

256
00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:58,480
or she admits to when stepping towards

257
00:08:56,720 --> 00:09:01,279
the table and those roles will have to

258
00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:02,959
be filled so we will see people who are

259
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:04,720
reluctant to take over those roles or

260
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:05,600
people who will be eager

261
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:06,880
and

262
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:08,720
because you're a

263
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:11,279
friend group it's very safe for all of

264
00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:14,160
you to do but if you're a new group

265
00:09:11,279 --> 00:09:16,399
that can be quite um intimidating when

266
00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:18,800
you you talked about the example about

267
00:09:16,399 --> 00:09:20,959
having professional meeting and how

268
00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:24,000
those group dynamics are there as well

269
00:09:20,959 --> 00:09:25,839
well you can very easily if you're a new

270
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:28,160
player to dnd i'm just trying to make

271
00:09:25,839 --> 00:09:30,720
the comparison if you're a new player to

272
00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:32,480
dnd never played it before and you've

273
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:34,560
paid this guy being me

274
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:36,880
to get your first experience you don't

275
00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:39,279
know anyone at the table so you get into

276
00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:40,800
your local gaming store or local gaming

277
00:09:39,279 --> 00:09:42,959
shop or however you want to call it you

278
00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:44,480
know there's been a reservation made at

279
00:09:42,959 --> 00:09:48,800
that table and you walk towards that

280
00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:51,360
table and you see at that table already

281
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:53,360
eight people sitting how likely are you

282
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:55,040
to sit down and start talking with any

283
00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:57,680
of them

284
00:09:55,040 --> 00:10:00,080
but take that same example but instead

285
00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:01,360
of eight people there's three

286
00:10:00,080 --> 00:10:03,680
people sitting

287
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:06,720
how lucky are you then

288
00:10:03,680 --> 00:10:08,399
so that's why the size is very important

289
00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:10,399
for people to

290
00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:13,120
feel safe feel welcome

291
00:10:10,399 --> 00:10:14,959
to feel like they're a part of a group

292
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:17,600
another part of

293
00:10:14,959 --> 00:10:20,079
this statistic being

294
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:22,240
an audience eight plus you you're

295
00:10:20,079 --> 00:10:24,399
pushing to what i would consider an

296
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:27,519
audience as in a passive

297
00:10:24,399 --> 00:10:28,959
consumer rather than a member of a team

298
00:10:27,519 --> 00:10:30,720
so yeah i can absolutely you know to

299
00:10:28,959 --> 00:10:33,200
answer that question yeah absolutely you

300
00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:34,959
would be less uh you'd be more reluctant

301
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,640
because you kind of just assume i'm just

302
00:10:34,959 --> 00:10:38,720
here for the ride that's why with my

303
00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:40,399
professional groups i try not to go any

304
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:42,720
higher than five

305
00:10:40,399 --> 00:10:45,440
especially if they don't know each other

306
00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:47,120
because there's two reasons five is not

307
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:48,720
too much to actually have a voice in the

308
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:52,240
group even if you're new or if you're

309
00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:54,240
quiet and it means that they are an

310
00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:56,480
uneven number

311
00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:58,000
so it will make it harder for them to

312
00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:59,760
sit still

313
00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:01,040
what i mean by that is as they can be

314
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:03,360
indecisive

315
00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:04,640
if if they're they have a

316
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:06,560
a problem and they're thinking about how

317
00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:07,839
to solve it yes and they're taking a

318
00:11:06,560 --> 00:11:09,440
vote there's always going to be one

319
00:11:07,839 --> 00:11:11,200
group with three votes

320
00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:12,800
so they it's a it's a group that will

321
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,640
keep going forward the moment you have

322
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,519
an even number in your group those

323
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,200
things

324
00:11:15,519 --> 00:11:18,560
can get quite dragging

325
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:20,480
mm-hmm

326
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:22,320
i thought i i'm smiling i'm grinning

327
00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:24,399
here because i love

328
00:11:22,320 --> 00:11:26,480
those kind of things back in my academic

329
00:11:24,399 --> 00:11:27,839
days i was very hot on my surveys and

330
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:29,920
things like you know central tendency

331
00:11:27,839 --> 00:11:31,279
bias and fence sitting and all that kind

332
00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:33,920
of stuff so when you do a survey

333
00:11:31,279 --> 00:11:35,680
questionnaire i always like to do it on

334
00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:37,440
an even number conversely because you

335
00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:39,440
can't just pick the middle one then so

336
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,320
if you have a scale of four you have to

337
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:41,600
pick

338
00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:43,760
three and four being slightly more

339
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,800
positive and one and two being slightly

340
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:47,200
negative

341
00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:49,279
otherwise everybody just blasts three as

342
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:51,200
neutral don't care neutral don't care so

343
00:11:49,279 --> 00:11:54,480
it's a similar thing and that's why it's

344
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:55,360
ticking that same box for me in that

345
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:57,839
i

346
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:59,279
even if that binary decision comes up at

347
00:11:57,839 --> 00:12:01,200
some point in a campaign which it might

348
00:11:59,279 --> 00:12:03,040
not but i think most will have at some

349
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:05,600
point should we

350
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:08,399
steal or kill or should we run or should

351
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:10,399
we hide there'll always be that decision

352
00:12:08,399 --> 00:12:12,560
at some point that comes up that's like

353
00:12:10,399 --> 00:12:16,000
gonna split the party

354
00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:17,680
to use the the trope and

355
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:20,240
yeah i i'm just grinning now because i

356
00:12:17,680 --> 00:12:21,680
just love how elegant that situation is

357
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:23,360
to having an odd number of players to be

358
00:12:21,680 --> 00:12:24,720
like well it's going to be very quickly

359
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:26,079
resolved because

360
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:27,519
three of you are going to want to do x

361
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,639
and only two of you are going to want to

362
00:12:27,519 --> 00:12:31,360
do y

363
00:12:28,639 --> 00:12:32,480
it also gives all of them an important

364
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,560
vote

365
00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:35,440
because each vote will count toward the

366
00:12:34,560 --> 00:12:37,839
end

367
00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:39,760
so there's no space to be indecisive

368
00:12:37,839 --> 00:12:41,120
because if one person is in the size

369
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:43,279
indecisive

370
00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:46,000
then the party can go on it's gonna be

371
00:12:43,279 --> 00:12:49,360
two against two for example

372
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:50,959
yeah forcing forcing the decision there

373
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:52,959
which is quite interesting and the other

374
00:12:50,959 --> 00:12:55,040
thing i wanted to mention there about

375
00:12:52,959 --> 00:12:56,320
i'm going to say power dynamics as you

376
00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:58,160
said i've

377
00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:59,680
pay close attention to

378
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:01,120
my new party going forward tomorrow

379
00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:02,399
night which i absolutely will this i'm

380
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:03,200
so glad we're recording this tonight

381
00:13:02,399 --> 00:13:04,399
because it couldn't have come at a

382
00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,760
better time

383
00:13:04,399 --> 00:13:07,920
and what i'm going to do is listen to

384
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:09,600
this one actually drops again

385
00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:11,920
after a few weeks of actually playing in

386
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:13,839
the new dynamic and look back at myself

387
00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:16,480
and probably call myself an idiot uh but

388
00:13:13,839 --> 00:13:18,839
that's the benefit hindsight but uh i

389
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:22,959
think a lot of people are

390
00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:25,920
sometimes reluctant to think of

391
00:13:22,959 --> 00:13:28,160
their players at their table in that

392
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:29,839
way in that like

393
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:32,320
power dynamic way like there's a

394
00:13:29,839 --> 00:13:33,040
decision maker there's a leader there's

395
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,600
a

396
00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:37,360
you know a more passive player

397
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:39,120
this that and the other and yeah

398
00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,560
sometimes they're lined the lines are

399
00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,920
blurred between

400
00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:43,279
characters and players but more often

401
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:45,519
than not you know ultimately it's a

402
00:13:43,279 --> 00:13:48,480
human game for humans to play together

403
00:13:45,519 --> 00:13:50,800
as a social event so it's

404
00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:53,680
if you really drill down to it it's

405
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:55,040
it's down to the players behind them and

406
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:56,959
i don't think there should be that

407
00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:58,639
reluctance to

408
00:13:56,959 --> 00:14:00,320
thinking about your party or your

409
00:13:58,639 --> 00:14:03,120
friends in that way because it can help

410
00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:05,440
as especially as a dm to

411
00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:07,360
build those

412
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:09,199
engaging and sometimes difficult

413
00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:11,040
encounters because you can kind of play

414
00:14:09,199 --> 00:14:12,480
on those tropes you know

415
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:14,480
you can kind of

416
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,839
put the character who you know the

417
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,959
decision maker

418
00:14:15,839 --> 00:14:18,560
in

419
00:14:16,959 --> 00:14:20,399
prison or something or whatever so you

420
00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:21,440
know remove them from the equation to

421
00:14:20,399 --> 00:14:23,279
then

422
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:25,440
stir the pot

423
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:28,079
a little bit as it were i think one of

424
00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:29,600
the reasons why players don't like to be

425
00:14:28,079 --> 00:14:31,600
or to hear that you're thinking about

426
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:33,760
them in that way is because it makes

427
00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:36,639
them feel i think ostracized is that

428
00:14:33,760 --> 00:14:39,839
right but uh in a way yeah i imagine

429
00:14:36,639 --> 00:14:42,160
it's one one one thing they feel yeah um

430
00:14:39,839 --> 00:14:44,639
but what it actually does is that it

431
00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:47,120
creates an environment where you as a

432
00:14:44,639 --> 00:14:48,959
game master can very well control the

433
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:50,639
speed and the narrative of your game

434
00:14:48,959 --> 00:14:52,160
because you know your players very well

435
00:14:50,639 --> 00:14:55,519
because you know them as friends and as

436
00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:59,199
people and not as a statistic and

437
00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:59,199
one of the things i've done before um

438
00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:03,279
they're gonna listen to this they're not

439
00:15:00,639 --> 00:15:05,440
gonna like it but um sometimes you have

440
00:15:03,279 --> 00:15:07,600
some plot points or some blood hooks you

441
00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:09,839
wanna throw at your party

442
00:15:07,600 --> 00:15:12,639
but you want them to take their time

443
00:15:09,839 --> 00:15:13,839
before they actually go through with it

444
00:15:12,639 --> 00:15:16,560
i will throw

445
00:15:13,839 --> 00:15:17,920
those plot hooks at the

446
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:20,880
more

447
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:22,160
passive players yes and it will work

448
00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:23,839
perfectly on the narrative and they

449
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:26,000
won't even know themselves

450
00:15:23,839 --> 00:15:27,760
but they will do two or three other plot

451
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,680
points before they get to the passive

452
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,519
players pop point because then

453
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:33,199
it's all they have left to do for

454
00:15:31,519 --> 00:15:35,199
example they've exhausted all the other

455
00:15:33,199 --> 00:15:38,720
options yeah yeah and then they will

456
00:15:35,199 --> 00:15:40,800
find a major um story

457
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:42,560
development through that plot point

458
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:45,279
but it's it's sometimes when i when i

459
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:47,199
want some emotions or

460
00:15:45,279 --> 00:15:49,360
some story to linger

461
00:15:47,199 --> 00:15:50,639
a bit longer i

462
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,160
play with them

463
00:15:50,639 --> 00:15:53,600
and i play with them in different ways i

464
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,199
play with them by giving them plot hooks

465
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:57,360
but also play with them by

466
00:15:55,199 --> 00:15:59,279
i'm talking with them separately i talk

467
00:15:57,360 --> 00:16:00,800
a lot with my players when i'm at gm

468
00:15:59,279 --> 00:16:02,880
especially when i'm on a long time

469
00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:04,240
campaign i try to talk with them i try

470
00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:05,519
to ask them what they like what they

471
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:07,279
didn't like what they want to see

472
00:16:05,519 --> 00:16:09,199
changed by the next session all those

473
00:16:07,279 --> 00:16:10,639
things especially if they pay me but one

474
00:16:09,199 --> 00:16:11,680
of the things i'm going to do is i'm

475
00:16:10,639 --> 00:16:13,600
going to talk with them about their

476
00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:15,920
characters and what their characters

477
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:17,920
wants to achieve in this world

478
00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:19,279
i'm going to look for a way how i can

479
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:21,680
connect them to

480
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:22,639
allies npcs but also to other players

481
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,399
and

482
00:16:22,639 --> 00:16:26,160
a shared unison

483
00:16:24,399 --> 00:16:28,399
of what they want to achieve

484
00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:30,480
and i need to think about the way my

485
00:16:28,399 --> 00:16:32,880
group works and what my group dynamics

486
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:34,560
are to be able to work this way

487
00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:36,800
it's something that speeds up my game

488
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:38,880
and that always will give my players the

489
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:40,880
feeling of that they're in charge it

490
00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:42,720
gives them this um

491
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:45,040
everlasting sandbox

492
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:47,920
because i know how to

493
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:50,560
work them it's not the right term but

494
00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:52,000
i know what makes them tick

495
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:55,120
so i also know

496
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:56,639
what will set them off on an adventure

497
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:59,040
yeah you know the opposite yeah of

498
00:16:56,639 --> 00:17:01,360
course but i think the most important

499
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:03,759
part of that is having a safe space

500
00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:06,160
especially with very new players and

501
00:17:03,759 --> 00:17:08,880
a safe space is one that is shared and

502
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:10,959
open and it's very easy to say that you

503
00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:13,039
need to create a safe space but there's

504
00:17:10,959 --> 00:17:15,039
different practices to do that i know

505
00:17:13,039 --> 00:17:17,120
some gyms who use

506
00:17:15,039 --> 00:17:18,959
red light green light orange light to

507
00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:21,360
know when to draw the curtain or when

508
00:17:18,959 --> 00:17:25,199
not to yeah but one of the things i try

509
00:17:21,360 --> 00:17:26,640
to do are very simple ones i try to

510
00:17:25,199 --> 00:17:29,679
ask my players to talk about their

511
00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:31,840
characters before a session for example

512
00:17:29,679 --> 00:17:32,880
what's the favorite breakfast of your

513
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:35,120
character

514
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:36,320
it's very simple question but it creates

515
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:38,400
this

516
00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:40,320
space between the players where you know

517
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:42,080
this about me and i know this about you

518
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:43,520
and the more they know about each other

519
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:45,600
the safer they will feel because they

520
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:47,200
will feel some kind of connection can be

521
00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:49,280
a bad connection can be a good

522
00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:51,840
connection that doesn't actually really

523
00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:53,919
matter but it will create these spaces

524
00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:56,640
and when i get a new group one of the

525
00:17:53,919 --> 00:17:58,240
first things i ask is what's your name

526
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:59,440
what's your character's name what's your

527
00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:02,000
experience

528
00:17:59,440 --> 00:18:04,240
just these very simple questions but if

529
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:07,039
i have a veteran player at a table

530
00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:08,880
he will know this is a newbie i might be

531
00:18:07,039 --> 00:18:10,400
able to help this person with this or

532
00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,919
with that

533
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:14,240
or maybe i need to give this person a

534
00:18:11,919 --> 00:18:16,480
little bit more space to actually get

535
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:19,600
into the spotlight

536
00:18:16,480 --> 00:18:22,080
yeah i have a list of um

537
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:24,080
you know inconsequential fluff

538
00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:26,080
questions like

539
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:28,480
what have you got in your pockets

540
00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:29,919
you know to the character uh and

541
00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:31,039
obviously that's

542
00:18:29,919 --> 00:18:32,559
you know you don't have a you don't have

543
00:18:31,039 --> 00:18:34,480
your you know your great sword in your

544
00:18:32,559 --> 00:18:35,679
pocket so it makes them think

545
00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:37,840
about

546
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:38,559
those minor details

547
00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:41,280
but

548
00:18:38,559 --> 00:18:43,120
what i'm getting at is it helps to

549
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:46,480
the more information you have the more

550
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:48,559
you can plot that kind of social

551
00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:52,000
network of

552
00:18:48,559 --> 00:18:55,200
connections and boundaries and lines and

553
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:57,200
things to build off of or or not go near

554
00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:59,440
or whatever it might be so even even

555
00:18:57,200 --> 00:19:01,200
those small inconsequential things like

556
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:02,080
what have you got in your pockets

557
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:04,400
lint

558
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:06,080
like nothing it's it still paints a

559
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,760
picture there for everybody both the

560
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:09,120
characters and the players

561
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:10,559
and it still

562
00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:12,880
provides

563
00:19:10,559 --> 00:19:14,960
value to most games

564
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:16,080
it also leads to players being able to

565
00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:18,640
talk

566
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:20,880
amongst themselves during breaks

567
00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:22,880
or just before games or

568
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:24,880
for example if you have two people in

569
00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:26,640
your game who really love to paint

570
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:28,559
figurines

571
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:30,160
but it's the first time playing together

572
00:19:28,559 --> 00:19:31,600
and they don't know each other

573
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:33,120
and

574
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:34,559
you just ask for the game about your

575
00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:36,480
hobbies and it and they say i like to

576
00:19:34,559 --> 00:19:38,000
paint figurines well they're gonna have

577
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:39,440
something to talk about even when you're

578
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:41,280
not at the table

579
00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:43,360
and so that opens a connection between

580
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:45,520
them and from that connection they'll be

581
00:19:43,360 --> 00:19:47,919
able to um

582
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:49,679
easily shift roles between the group

583
00:19:47,919 --> 00:19:52,400
they'll feel more comfortable

584
00:19:49,679 --> 00:19:54,080
about speaking their mind about taking

585
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:55,520
control about

586
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:57,840
sitting backwards because they know

587
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:59,120
they're talking to a person

588
00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:01,280
they know you're talking to another

589
00:19:59,120 --> 00:20:03,760
human being and

590
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,799
not some kind of weirdo they've just met

591
00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:06,720
or

592
00:20:04,799 --> 00:20:08,480
yes some hooded figure who's sitting

593
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:11,200
there with them at the table who's just

594
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:13,360
only grabbing dice all the time and not

595
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:15,919
really talking anything else it gives it

596
00:20:13,360 --> 00:20:18,080
makes it humane

597
00:20:15,919 --> 00:20:19,600
exactly that is the bit that

598
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:21,039
i think

599
00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:23,919
is

600
00:20:21,039 --> 00:20:25,360
sometimes missing i've seen a lot of you

601
00:20:23,919 --> 00:20:26,720
know session zero stuff i've seen a lot

602
00:20:25,360 --> 00:20:27,919
of the safety tools that we've already

603
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,200
alluded to

604
00:20:27,919 --> 00:20:31,200
but i haven't

605
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:33,120
heard of that

606
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:36,080
injection of humanity

607
00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:38,400
that much that spend time spend 15

608
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:40,640
minutes doing a funnily enough a

609
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:43,440
traditional icebreaker that you do very

610
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:45,360
often in corporate environments

611
00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:48,720
and team building exercises for that

612
00:20:45,360 --> 00:20:50,400
exact reason to be like let's get rid of

613
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:52,559
some of those boundaries

614
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:55,679
let's let everybody relax

615
00:20:52,559 --> 00:20:58,559
and i know this first hand

616
00:20:55,679 --> 00:21:00,559
because i have gone to way back when

617
00:20:58,559 --> 00:21:03,760
before i had my lovely group of players

618
00:21:00,559 --> 00:21:05,840
that i do now i have partaken in a

619
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:08,080
couple of random

620
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:10,400
you know just turned up one night

621
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:11,520
at a gaming

622
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,679
scene

623
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:15,280
and you know ahead of time on facebook

624
00:21:13,679 --> 00:21:17,120
plan to join you know who's looking for

625
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,159
a player okay i guess i'll join your

626
00:21:17,120 --> 00:21:19,679
table

627
00:21:18,159 --> 00:21:21,679
and

628
00:21:19,679 --> 00:21:23,679
that game was

629
00:21:21,679 --> 00:21:26,480
desperately missing everything we've

630
00:21:23,679 --> 00:21:29,039
just discussed in the last 20 minutes

631
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:31,200
because if we if we boil it all down if

632
00:21:29,039 --> 00:21:32,480
you really look into it why do you play

633
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,760
d d

634
00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:35,039
you can't tell me it's first story

635
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:37,360
because if you want a really magnificent

636
00:21:35,039 --> 00:21:39,200
story go [ __ ] read a book

637
00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:40,960
you can you can tell me it's because of

638
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,400
the mechanics and i really love how dice

639
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:45,760
work

640
00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:47,360
there's a lot of other ttrpgs who have

641
00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:49,600
those kind of mechanics who may even

642
00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:50,960
have better mechanics if you talk about

643
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:52,080
with some people

644
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:54,400
they

645
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:55,360
for example one one of the um selling

646
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:57,200
points

647
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:58,559
while people are trying to sell me call

648
00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:00,559
of duty is because they think the

649
00:21:58,559 --> 00:22:02,559
dynamics work better in in that game

650
00:22:00,559 --> 00:22:04,960
just purely mechanically for me the

651
00:22:02,559 --> 00:22:06,960
reason i play d d is because i'm

652
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:08,480
you're creating a story but it's with

653
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,159
other people it's for the social

654
00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:12,240
interaction that you play a lot of

655
00:22:10,159 --> 00:22:13,440
people play the indeed to just have fun

656
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:14,720
and beers

657
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:16,960
and they don't really care about

658
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:18,960
anything else so for me the core of the

659
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:21,760
game is at that if you want to do a

660
00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:23,600
great role-playing game you can

661
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:25,280
but you don't care about

662
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:27,360
having these other people around you and

663
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:29,679
table on which you can bounce ideas off

664
00:22:27,360 --> 00:22:31,760
and and go completely nuts and the way

665
00:22:29,679 --> 00:22:35,120
you want to then there's there's no

666
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:37,840
point you can just do any uh video video

667
00:22:35,120 --> 00:22:40,080
game go play baldur's gate 3 or go play

668
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:42,640
um i don't know dragon age inquisition

669
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:44,400
i'd go go play world of warcraft

670
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:45,200
but it's about that social interaction

671
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,600
and

672
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:49,280
but that that's why i'm so concerned

673
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:51,679
about the social aspect of the game

674
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:55,120
because for me that's the core of it

675
00:22:51,679 --> 00:22:57,360
yeah i i completely agree like

676
00:22:55,120 --> 00:22:59,679
when it comes down to

677
00:22:57,360 --> 00:23:02,559
there's so many discussions around

678
00:22:59,679 --> 00:23:04,480
you know fudging dice and avoiding tpks

679
00:23:02,559 --> 00:23:08,559
and and so many questions i see online

680
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:10,640
that are like in fact the dm at my dm in

681
00:23:08,559 --> 00:23:13,120
in one of the games i play in

682
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:15,520
he knows that i obviously dm and and do

683
00:23:13,120 --> 00:23:18,400
the podcast and stuff so he i guess i'm

684
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:20,320
considered his confidant for

685
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,840
the questions and he trusts me again

686
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:23,360
part of that social contract he trusts

687
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,640
me not to me a game if he tells me stuff

688
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:26,640
that's coming up and one of the

689
00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:28,960
questions he had recently was like

690
00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:30,640
i've got a combat account coming up and

691
00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:32,799
should i

692
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:34,720
lower the difficulty because of the

693
00:23:32,799 --> 00:23:37,200
state that some of the player characters

694
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:39,520
are in and how you haven't really taken

695
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:40,320
time to rest and you know some people

696
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:42,400
have

697
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:45,200
you know lost all their spell slots and

698
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:47,039
haven't short-rested to heal

699
00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:49,520
and bear in mind i'm talking about

700
00:23:47,039 --> 00:23:51,200
my party so i'm negatively impacting my

701
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,960
own character's

702
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:55,600
likelihood of survival here but i was

703
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:57,120
like no no way man like no way because

704
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:58,320
the logical

705
00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:59,600
end point

706
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:02,799
of that

707
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:06,320
is the the lower we get in hp and

708
00:24:02,799 --> 00:24:08,240
spell slots the easy make the fights

709
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:11,679
until we end up fighting a dragon with

710
00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:13,679
two hp and ac5 because

711
00:24:11,679 --> 00:24:15,200
there's only one of us left standing

712
00:24:13,679 --> 00:24:17,520
that's like

713
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:19,520
i've taken that to an extreme i know but

714
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:22,000
that is the way

715
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:24,960
that he was suggesting absolutely do not

716
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:26,480
agree with that logic i'm sorry i

717
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:29,120
don't know

718
00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:31,520
no because it works that way for your

719
00:24:29,120 --> 00:24:32,799
party and and i'm sure it works fine and

720
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:34,640
and

721
00:24:32,799 --> 00:24:36,159
if i'm having the idea of the party you

722
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:38,880
have that i have then

723
00:24:36,159 --> 00:24:40,799
you're 100 correct but sometimes you

724
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:42,960
have these kind of parties who are just

725
00:24:40,799 --> 00:24:45,120
there because they want to feel like

726
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:47,360
[ __ ] heroes and they want to slay

727
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:48,880
some monsters and they don't really care

728
00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:50,559
about anything else

729
00:24:48,880 --> 00:24:52,480
and if you are going to play that way

730
00:24:50,559 --> 00:24:54,240
with them and they're going to

731
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:56,159
die some kind of character

732
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:57,760
it won't work for them

733
00:24:56,159 --> 00:24:59,520
because they're the kind of players who

734
00:24:57,760 --> 00:25:01,679
come to a game to

735
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:03,760
before the game chat 20 to 30 minutes

736
00:25:01,679 --> 00:25:04,960
about their personal lives and about how

737
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:06,880
things going with their kids and their

738
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:09,120
wives and everything else in their work

739
00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:10,799
and then they just want to sit down turn

740
00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:12,000
off the old nub

741
00:25:10,799 --> 00:25:15,919
and

742
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:17,919
just have fun throwing dice with their

743
00:25:15,919 --> 00:25:19,039
friends and they want don't want to

744
00:25:17,919 --> 00:25:20,640
think about consequences we're

745
00:25:19,039 --> 00:25:23,120
constantly talking about consequences of

746
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:25,039
characters in dnd but in some groups

747
00:25:23,120 --> 00:25:27,120
consequences don't care

748
00:25:25,039 --> 00:25:28,799
they don't care about it and it's it's

749
00:25:27,120 --> 00:25:30,080
fine it can be great if that's the way

750
00:25:28,799 --> 00:25:32,080
you want to play

751
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:33,360
i've had tables where there's where

752
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,640
you're in the middle of role-playing

753
00:25:33,360 --> 00:25:37,039
there's time to talk about other

754
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:38,880
people's personal lives

755
00:25:37,039 --> 00:25:40,720
and that's okay as long as everyone in

756
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:42,559
the group is okay with that indeed

757
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:43,520
indeed and just to be clear i don't i'm

758
00:25:42,559 --> 00:25:45,840
not

759
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:48,480
suggesting that that is a wrong way to

760
00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:49,279
play by any means the point i was trying

761
00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:51,440
to

762
00:25:49,279 --> 00:25:53,360
build to was actually of your own in

763
00:25:51,440 --> 00:25:56,159
terms of for me at least

764
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:57,840
when you start getting to that level of

765
00:25:56,159 --> 00:25:59,840
scriptedness

766
00:25:57,840 --> 00:26:01,679
for me it's not telling a story together

767
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:03,600
anymore it's

768
00:26:01,679 --> 00:26:05,039
reading a book when i know that we can't

769
00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:06,799
lose

770
00:26:05,039 --> 00:26:09,200
because the day i'm not gonna let it

771
00:26:06,799 --> 00:26:12,000
happen for me then i'd be like well i

772
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:14,559
could read the you know all of the rings

773
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:15,840
and have a fantasy

774
00:26:14,559 --> 00:26:17,440
story there that's a million times

775
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:20,559
better than whatever nonsense we've been

776
00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:23,600
putting together for the last year

777
00:26:20,559 --> 00:26:25,440
i i think i get what you're seeing

778
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:26,880
and i think we're actually talking about

779
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:29,679
the same thing and i'm looking for a

780
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:31,360
good way to explain it and

781
00:26:29,679 --> 00:26:33,760
i'm gonna use a very good way do you

782
00:26:31,360 --> 00:26:35,279
know um the scene in the hobbit where

783
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:37,279
legolas

784
00:26:35,279 --> 00:26:39,360
shoots off the shield and kills like a

785
00:26:37,279 --> 00:26:42,480
dozen orcs where it's physically

786
00:26:39,360 --> 00:26:43,679
impossible to do so um and then he

787
00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:45,919
walks up

788
00:26:43,679 --> 00:26:47,200
falling rocks um

789
00:26:45,919 --> 00:26:48,159
i mean i've seen i haven't really seen

790
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:50,080
the hobbit i've seen all the rings a

791
00:26:48,159 --> 00:26:52,880
couple times but i i mean i can picture

792
00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:55,360
it so yes we'll say let's just take a

793
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:57,279
lot of rings then for example yeah if

794
00:26:55,360 --> 00:26:59,039
you're gonna tell a lot of the rings to

795
00:26:57,279 --> 00:27:01,200
a george rr martin

796
00:26:59,039 --> 00:27:02,480
group yeah fan group they're gonna hate

797
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:04,559
it

798
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:07,440
you can't run lord of the rings with a

799
00:27:04,559 --> 00:27:09,120
group who is george rr martin minded

800
00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:10,480
they're gonna love the way you play

801
00:27:09,120 --> 00:27:13,279
intrigue and the way you're gonna kill

802
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:14,960
off characters but if you're just having

803
00:27:13,279 --> 00:27:17,360
a lord of the rings group who just wants

804
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:19,440
to be these fantastic heroes

805
00:27:17,360 --> 00:27:21,279
with a few challenges in the way then

806
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:23,760
you have to play him that way

807
00:27:21,279 --> 00:27:26,399
so it's a part of group dynamic is is

808
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:28,399
not only the dynamics in the group but

809
00:27:26,399 --> 00:27:30,320
the dynamic the whole group has towards

810
00:27:28,399 --> 00:27:32,880
you as a dungeon master as well as a

811
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:35,520
game master and the way you feed on to

812
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:38,399
that yeah the the the

813
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:40,320
the personality of the group as a whole

814
00:27:38,399 --> 00:27:42,559
you know greater than some of its parts

815
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:44,720
yeah oh oh

816
00:27:42,559 --> 00:27:46,000
there we go and that that's why i talk

817
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:47,679
about um

818
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:50,000
having um

819
00:27:47,679 --> 00:27:52,240
beer and battle groups and having um

820
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:54,720
social intrigue groups and having these

821
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:56,880
kind of um almost actor

822
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:58,320
playing groups

823
00:27:56,880 --> 00:28:00,159
and it's something i've i've started

824
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,919
developing when i started gm and

825
00:28:00,159 --> 00:28:03,360
professionally because now i have all

826
00:28:01,919 --> 00:28:06,720
these kinds of groups

827
00:28:03,360 --> 00:28:08,799
and all of them are fun in their own way

828
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:10,000
the challenge for you as a gym i find

829
00:28:08,799 --> 00:28:11,360
personally

830
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:14,559
is to

831
00:28:11,360 --> 00:28:17,360
find what makes you tick with them

832
00:28:14,559 --> 00:28:19,760
find what what draws you into gaming

833
00:28:17,360 --> 00:28:21,520
with them in their way

834
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:23,120
if you want to be a professional gender

835
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:24,000
master it's something you have to think

836
00:28:23,120 --> 00:28:27,679
about

837
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:32,000
i'm not personally a big kind of dungeon

838
00:28:27,679 --> 00:28:34,960
delving pure combat type of guy

839
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:37,039
but i have a group like that right now

840
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:38,799
and so i'm thinking about what's the

841
00:28:37,039 --> 00:28:40,559
challenge for me here what am i going to

842
00:28:38,799 --> 00:28:43,600
get out of this game personally so i

843
00:28:40,559 --> 00:28:45,120
don't get burned up in the end

844
00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:46,240
you know because if i'm just going to

845
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:48,399
run a group

846
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:50,320
with that type of dynamic and i'm not

847
00:28:48,399 --> 00:28:52,320
that type of dynamic myself

848
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:54,080
i'm going to get reluctant to it and i'm

849
00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:56,080
not going to prepare and the game is

850
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:58,559
going to go down and i can't do that

851
00:28:56,080 --> 00:29:00,480
it's a professional setting yeah yeah so

852
00:28:58,559 --> 00:29:01,760
one of the things i i've started doing

853
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:04,080
and and

854
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:07,120
i think one of the best ids i've ever

855
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:09,200
had with them was running um

856
00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:12,240
that house and the christmas rot

857
00:29:09,200 --> 00:29:15,039
and so i can i'm creating a kind of

858
00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:16,080
curse of struts setting with a lot more

859
00:29:15,039 --> 00:29:18,159
um

860
00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:20,480
not particularly underground dungeon but

861
00:29:18,159 --> 00:29:23,360
dungeon structures and now i'm gonna

862
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:25,679
place those little bits of lore and and

863
00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:27,840
story in those dungeons something i'm

864
00:29:25,679 --> 00:29:29,279
not used to doing so i'm finding a

865
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:31,600
challenge there for myself which keeps

866
00:29:29,279 --> 00:29:33,760
me going which keeps me interested

867
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:35,200
and that's also a dynamic in itself what

868
00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:37,919
can i get out of this group and what can

869
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:39,360
this group get out of me

870
00:29:37,919 --> 00:29:41,360
yeah i like to

871
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:42,720
think of it in my head as a more a

872
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:45,360
visual learner

873
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:47,600
is you know like two sign waves

874
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:49,279
on a you know sound you know sound waves

875
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,880
and the dm is one and the players of

876
00:29:49,279 --> 00:29:53,200
several players of the group as a some

877
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:55,039
of us as a legion as some of us whole

878
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:57,760
and when those two

879
00:29:55,039 --> 00:29:59,440
sine waves are in alignment you know

880
00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:01,120
they are amplifying each other and

881
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:02,640
everybody's having a lot of fun but

882
00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:04,960
sometimes they kind of shift out of

883
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:06,480
alignment a little bit and

884
00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:08,159
i've had that

885
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:10,000
you know it's i think the thing

886
00:30:08,159 --> 00:30:11,520
everything we've talked about is as with

887
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:12,640
humans

888
00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:15,360
it's always

889
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:17,360
variable right things change over time

890
00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:19,600
everything changes over time not to

891
00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:21,120
sound too nihilistic and that entropy

892
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:23,039
and stuff but uh

893
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:25,200
humans and and what they like and don't

894
00:30:23,039 --> 00:30:28,559
like in groups as a product of that

895
00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:30,399
change over time as does the dm so even

896
00:30:28,559 --> 00:30:33,760
in my own game for the last three years

897
00:30:30,399 --> 00:30:34,799
like i've had periods of uh you know

898
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:36,799
resonance

899
00:30:34,799 --> 00:30:40,399
where the sine waves have been 100

900
00:30:36,799 --> 00:30:42,240
aligned and i'm stoked for every

901
00:30:40,399 --> 00:30:44,799
fortnight every session

902
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:46,159
and i'm you know getting a lot out of of

903
00:30:44,799 --> 00:30:48,399
prep um

904
00:30:46,159 --> 00:30:49,279
and i've had times where those two waves

905
00:30:48,399 --> 00:30:52,240
kind of

906
00:30:49,279 --> 00:30:54,080
move out of alignment like uh

907
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:56,720
to use a pop culture reference uh sync

908
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:59,279
rate in neon genesis evangelion uh

909
00:30:56,720 --> 00:31:01,679
and the think great lowers and

910
00:30:59,279 --> 00:31:04,159
you know it's it's a bit more of a chore

911
00:31:01,679 --> 00:31:05,440
and it's a bit more of a oh god yeah i

912
00:31:04,159 --> 00:31:07,440
do have to go and

913
00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:08,480
throw that combat encounter together let

914
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:10,880
me

915
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:12,480
oh i guess they could fight

916
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:14,799
let me just throw a mimic because it's

917
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:16,480
easy and i could just throw it in and it

918
00:31:14,799 --> 00:31:19,760
kind of fits anywhere and

919
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:21,679
uh and you know it it changes over time

920
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:23,360
that's think great and

921
00:31:21,679 --> 00:31:25,919
which is which is my visual

922
00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:27,600
representation of what you could say

923
00:31:25,919 --> 00:31:30,159
you know dynamic

924
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:31,039
alignment i guess is one way to put it

925
00:31:30,159 --> 00:31:34,320
and

926
00:31:31,039 --> 00:31:36,080
i think being aware of that can solve

927
00:31:34,320 --> 00:31:38,320
lots of problems so like you were saying

928
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:39,360
like oh maybe i'm not

929
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:42,080
you know maybe i'm not really having a

930
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:44,640
lot of fun and if you if you think like

931
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:47,120
why and you do like a five wise analysis

932
00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:48,559
and you get down to it and you

933
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:50,240
you have i think maybe it's just a

934
00:31:48,559 --> 00:31:51,840
temporary thing maybe

935
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:53,120
a couple other players are going through

936
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:54,799
something in their personal lives and

937
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:56,640
that shifted the dynamic of the party at

938
00:31:54,799 --> 00:31:58,720
the table and it's

939
00:31:56,640 --> 00:32:00,720
therefore impacted you and oh okay

940
00:31:58,720 --> 00:32:02,880
that's fine let me see how i can

941
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:05,120
can work with that and stuff it's those

942
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:06,880
you know just having that

943
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:09,039
layer of thought

944
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:11,279
when it comes to

945
00:32:09,039 --> 00:32:13,200
the dynamics of the table and the people

946
00:32:11,279 --> 00:32:16,399
there and considering they're all human

947
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:20,480
and humans change because we are

948
00:32:16,399 --> 00:32:22,559
variable creatures over time can answer

949
00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:24,320
like so many questions so many quote

950
00:32:22,559 --> 00:32:28,120
unquote d d questions

951
00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:28,120
that come up online

952
00:32:31,930 --> 00:32:38,240
[Music]

953
00:32:36,159 --> 00:32:40,960
well last time we talked i was still

954
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:43,440
running my stunking standard campaign

955
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:45,200
and because of covet lockdowns we were

956
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:47,760
forced to go playing online

957
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:49,120
i had a group of 8 players online it's a

958
00:32:47,760 --> 00:32:52,399
mess

959
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:53,840
so i started asking my players if

960
00:32:52,399 --> 00:32:56,000
do you want to play online or not some

961
00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:57,360
of them said they didn't want to so i

962
00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:59,360
kept playing with a smaller group and

963
00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:01,360
then after a while some of them said

964
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:02,960
we actually do want to play because it

965
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:05,120
seems like there's no end

966
00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:07,039
and we want to play some dnd because now

967
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:08,640
we actually have more time than before

968
00:33:07,039 --> 00:33:10,960
and it would be fun

969
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:12,960
so i started playing every week i'm

970
00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:14,960
splitting the party in two story-wise as

971
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:17,440
well it worked perfectly two groups of

972
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:20,559
four they all had their own narrative

973
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:22,240
going forward but still i felt struggle

974
00:33:20,559 --> 00:33:24,240
especially when the group coinjoined

975
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:26,960
again and they would ate again i felt

976
00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:28,640
struggle something was wrong in my game

977
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:30,240
and i felt my players not being

978
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:32,480
enthusiastic as the way they were when

979
00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:35,519
we were on table and stuff like that

980
00:33:32,480 --> 00:33:37,519
so i asked them i kind of did a survey

981
00:33:35,519 --> 00:33:39,600
between my players and i asked them now

982
00:33:37,519 --> 00:33:40,480
that we're playing online what are you

983
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:42,559
trying

984
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:44,320
to get out of it

985
00:33:42,559 --> 00:33:46,640
why are you playing online

986
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:49,279
and most of them just said

987
00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:50,880
i just want to have fun and be together

988
00:33:49,279 --> 00:33:52,559
with friends because there's no other

989
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:54,880
way of doing that right now and that's

990
00:33:52,559 --> 00:33:56,480
why i want to keep playing the campaign

991
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:58,720
and so i said okay

992
00:33:56,480 --> 00:34:00,880
i dialed down a bit on the story

993
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:03,039
and did some very weird different things

994
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:05,679
with my game tried some very

995
00:34:03,039 --> 00:34:07,760
few things for example

996
00:34:05,679 --> 00:34:09,200
one night they got into a

997
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:11,359
dwarven bar

998
00:34:09,200 --> 00:34:13,520
and that whole night consisted of

999
00:34:11,359 --> 00:34:16,399
drinking games

1000
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:18,079
that we played at the computer together

1001
00:34:16,399 --> 00:34:19,119
instead of actually going through the

1002
00:34:18,079 --> 00:34:21,440
narrative

1003
00:34:19,119 --> 00:34:22,879
i've set up mazes that they could find

1004
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,879
out in in

1005
00:34:22,879 --> 00:34:27,040
on the computer with drinking rules

1006
00:34:24,879 --> 00:34:28,800
according to them because we just wanted

1007
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:30,560
to have a fun night but i told them

1008
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:32,399
beforehand that if they wanted we could

1009
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:33,919
do a drinking game so we

1010
00:34:32,399 --> 00:34:36,000
played for two hours and then we drank

1011
00:34:33,919 --> 00:34:38,159
for two hours

1012
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:40,879
and it's it was these weird little

1013
00:34:38,159 --> 00:34:43,839
implements that gave them the energy to

1014
00:34:40,879 --> 00:34:45,599
go on with the story

1015
00:34:43,839 --> 00:34:46,960
because they knew that

1016
00:34:45,599 --> 00:34:49,040
we could go for a bit of story but

1017
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:50,639
there's gonna be these fun times where

1018
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:52,879
we're just hanging out together and

1019
00:34:50,639 --> 00:34:54,480
we're just being friends and and we can

1020
00:34:52,879 --> 00:34:56,560
actually do what we used to do at the

1021
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:59,440
table together

1022
00:34:56,560 --> 00:35:00,880
so the environment can have a very big

1023
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:03,359
difference for your place and it can

1024
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:05,760
really change the way they want to play

1025
00:35:03,359 --> 00:35:07,760
i've had a player who went to a divorce

1026
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:09,839
very tough time for him

1027
00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:10,640
he didn't see me beforehand

1028
00:35:09,839 --> 00:35:12,480
but

1029
00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:14,240
i had a very big encounter that night

1030
00:35:12,480 --> 00:35:16,320
one of the main bosses

1031
00:35:14,240 --> 00:35:18,640
and i remember very well i

1032
00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:20,240
we printed out a lot of maps and and

1033
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:22,400
all different kinds of stuff

1034
00:35:20,240 --> 00:35:23,440
and so i was building up towards it for

1035
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:24,960
an hour and a half and then when the

1036
00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:26,560
combat started i said let's take a five

1037
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:29,760
minute break

1038
00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:32,079
that player started crying at the table

1039
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:34,079
and i had no idea what was going on

1040
00:35:32,079 --> 00:35:36,240
and it's why i'm telling this is because

1041
00:35:34,079 --> 00:35:38,240
i want to state out that it's still

1042
00:35:36,240 --> 00:35:39,119
about humans so

1043
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:41,200
i went

1044
00:35:39,119 --> 00:35:43,040
to him gave him a hug because he's a

1045
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:44,560
very close friend to me asked him what

1046
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,280
was going on he told me he was getting

1047
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:46,560
the

1048
00:35:45,280 --> 00:35:48,480
divorce

1049
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:50,400
and we talked a bit about it and i told

1050
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:52,480
him what do you what do you want to do

1051
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:54,640
now

1052
00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:56,079
because we're a group of friends

1053
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:58,400
everybody

1054
00:35:56,079 --> 00:36:00,800
will take a step aside for him for his

1055
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:02,320
needs in that moment

1056
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:03,920
and it's it's kind of like giving the

1057
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:05,680
spotlight

1058
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:08,240
because we have to look at it as a human

1059
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:09,200
way and he said the only reason i came

1060
00:36:08,240 --> 00:36:11,680
tonight

1061
00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:13,119
is because i wanted not to think about

1062
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,800
it

1063
00:36:13,119 --> 00:36:16,800
and at that moment i knew that i had

1064
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,920
been able to entertain him for an hour

1065
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,920
and a half

1066
00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:20,960
in a game while he was just getting

1067
00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:23,280
divorced

1068
00:36:20,960 --> 00:36:25,680
and i was able to take off his mind of

1069
00:36:23,280 --> 00:36:27,520
that that is gold

1070
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:29,599
no matter what anyone tells me to meet

1071
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:31,280
personally that's gold and that's why he

1072
00:36:29,599 --> 00:36:32,640
came

1073
00:36:31,280 --> 00:36:35,440
so i changed the shift to the group

1074
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:37,440
dynamic and i even went further into the

1075
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:38,320
narrative

1076
00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:41,760
just

1077
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:44,320
to keep him getting at it yeah keep his

1078
00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:45,440
brain on it yeah i started describing it

1079
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:47,200
more i

1080
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:49,200
try to do more special effects with my

1081
00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:51,280
mouth and all these kind of things um

1082
00:36:49,200 --> 00:36:53,440
making special sounds and

1083
00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:54,400
really getting everybody interested into

1084
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:57,040
it and

1085
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:58,079
making dice rolls very important

1086
00:36:57,040 --> 00:37:01,359
because i

1087
00:36:58,079 --> 00:37:03,760
i knew from that moment that i was there

1088
00:37:01,359 --> 00:37:05,440
to entertain him for a little bit

1089
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,640
and afterwards we were going to talk but

1090
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:08,640
i was there to entertain him that was

1091
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:11,440
his purpose at the table that's what he

1092
00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:12,640
was seeking out of it and as a dungeon

1093
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,720
master

1094
00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:15,680
i'm not telling you to lose yourself

1095
00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:18,400
but

1096
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:20,720
it's part of what you do

1097
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:24,400
yeah i mean my

1098
00:37:20,720 --> 00:37:26,480
my equivalent isn't quite um to that

1099
00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:29,440
level however i think i've mentioned it

1100
00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:31,440
on the show before where um

1101
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:33,520
long story short is you know i i was

1102
00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:34,240
thanking my players for something or you

1103
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:36,560
know

1104
00:37:34,240 --> 00:37:39,680
for their continued attendance

1105
00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:41,680
at my crazy adventure um

1106
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:43,359
orchestrating for us all

1107
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:45,359
and one of them was like

1108
00:37:43,359 --> 00:37:46,320
not like no way man we've been going

1109
00:37:45,359 --> 00:37:48,880
through

1110
00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:51,680
you know lockdowns in the uk and

1111
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:52,800
pandemics and being stuck at home with

1112
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:55,119
the kids

1113
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:57,440
and all that kind of stuff so like

1114
00:37:55,119 --> 00:37:59,839
i actively look forward to our game

1115
00:37:57,440 --> 00:38:02,480
every two weeks because it's it's this

1116
00:37:59,839 --> 00:38:03,760
you whiskers away to this fantasy land

1117
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:05,200
where i don't have to think about any of

1118
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:06,640
that nonsense

1119
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,640
and gang can just

1120
00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:11,040
sit down and

1121
00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:13,280
shoot fireballs and i was like oh

1122
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:14,320
i didn't know i was

1123
00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:16,079
yeah

1124
00:38:14,320 --> 00:38:19,040
you're welcome i guess i

1125
00:38:16,079 --> 00:38:20,800
i didn't realize it was that you know

1126
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:22,160
important to you and like when you said

1127
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:23,119
there that's golden that's when i was

1128
00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:24,640
like

1129
00:38:23,119 --> 00:38:25,920
i had the same feeling probably that was

1130
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,920
going through your head at that time i

1131
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:29,920
was like wow okay

1132
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:32,960
cool

1133
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:35,520
and that's when you can actually talk

1134
00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:37,599
about body dynamics

1135
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:39,200
when you start seeing each other as as

1136
00:38:37,599 --> 00:38:40,720
humans

1137
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,720
i'm not saying as friends because some

1138
00:38:40,720 --> 00:38:45,280
groups will never be friends sometimes

1139
00:38:42,720 --> 00:38:46,800
you just have have a weird group or have

1140
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:49,040
a lot of people who don't who don't know

1141
00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:51,280
each other together but um

1142
00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:53,920
one of the things i often hear complain

1143
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:56,000
about when we talk about party dynamics

1144
00:38:53,920 --> 00:38:57,760
is um knowing when to take and when to

1145
00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:59,119
give the spotlight

1146
00:38:57,760 --> 00:39:00,640
and the moment you start seeing each

1147
00:38:59,119 --> 00:39:02,640
other as people

1148
00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:05,680
you know you're not giving away the

1149
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:08,079
spotlight but it means you're putting it

1150
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:10,079
on another human being

1151
00:39:08,079 --> 00:39:12,640
and people will be less reluctant in

1152
00:39:10,079 --> 00:39:14,400
giving it yeah that i think it's an

1153
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:17,359
underrated requirement

1154
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:18,880
of ttrpgs is

1155
00:39:17,359 --> 00:39:21,200
social intelligence if that's the

1156
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:24,400
correct term i don't know but that kind

1157
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:26,079
of empathy of knowing hey

1158
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:26,960
that player hasn't spoken for quite some

1159
00:39:26,079 --> 00:39:28,800
time

1160
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:30,640
maybe we should give them

1161
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:31,920
some time and it like you said i like

1162
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:33,680
that idea of

1163
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:35,280
you're not giving up the spotlight

1164
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:38,079
you're shining it on someone else i like

1165
00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:39,839
that idea because it's quite like

1166
00:39:38,079 --> 00:39:41,040
you're you're becoming the cameraman so

1167
00:39:39,839 --> 00:39:42,880
you're not losing the spotlight and

1168
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:44,480
sitting in darkness you're becoming a

1169
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:46,480
pivotal part of the scene by giving the

1170
00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:48,000
spotlight to somebody else by being a

1171
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:50,079
member of the production team i think

1172
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:51,520
it's quite a nice way to think about it

1173
00:39:50,079 --> 00:39:53,359
and it builds in that collaborative

1174
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:56,480
notion but yeah that

1175
00:39:53,359 --> 00:39:58,720
that social intelligence of like i you

1176
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:00,160
know these people are having a moment or

1177
00:39:58,720 --> 00:40:02,560
i need to step back i've been you know

1178
00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:04,079
i've had my time i i've i was you know

1179
00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:06,640
had a one-on-one on the dm because i was

1180
00:40:04,079 --> 00:40:08,319
doing speak with plants for example for

1181
00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:09,119
10 minutes so

1182
00:40:08,319 --> 00:40:10,800
you know

1183
00:40:09,119 --> 00:40:12,000
none of the other players got really a

1184
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,200
look in

1185
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:14,480
then maybe if i you know if i don't

1186
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,359
speak for plants or 10 minutes maybe

1187
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:16,400
i'll just

1188
00:40:15,359 --> 00:40:17,920
i'd be able to step out of the

1189
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:20,000
conversation for a little bit just just

1190
00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:22,160
to give everybody else

1191
00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:24,880
some time if if indeed

1192
00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:26,079
that's what they want and that that is

1193
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:28,160
just

1194
00:40:26,079 --> 00:40:29,839
super super super important i think it's

1195
00:40:28,160 --> 00:40:31,280
so so

1196
00:40:29,839 --> 00:40:33,359
one of the hardest things to train and

1197
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:34,480
to learn if you're not fortunate enough

1198
00:40:33,359 --> 00:40:36,960
to have some kind of innate

1199
00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:40,079
understanding of it already but it is

1200
00:40:36,960 --> 00:40:42,480
that that's what pays

1201
00:40:40,079 --> 00:40:44,160
insane amount of dividends like way more

1202
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:46,319
than any kind of

1203
00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:48,560
optimal character builds way more than

1204
00:40:46,319 --> 00:40:50,319
any kind of note takers like oh everyone

1205
00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:52,000
loves a note taker yeah they're great

1206
00:40:50,319 --> 00:40:53,040
but if that notetaker is disruptive and

1207
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:55,680
never gives

1208
00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:57,200
other characters times to you know times

1209
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:58,560
the talk or

1210
00:40:57,200 --> 00:40:59,920
always needs to have the last word or

1211
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:00,960
something then

1212
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,880
they're not

1213
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:04,319
they're bringing way less value

1214
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:06,319
you know they're taking value more than

1215
00:41:04,319 --> 00:41:09,760
they're bringing by being the note taker

1216
00:41:06,319 --> 00:41:11,440
uh in my opinion but i think as you see

1217
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:14,319
everything we've talked about boils down

1218
00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:15,440
to that that human experience as we said

1219
00:41:14,319 --> 00:41:16,400
and

1220
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,480
it's tough

1221
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:20,720
it's tough i personally

1222
00:41:18,480 --> 00:41:23,040
partially blame um

1223
00:41:20,720 --> 00:41:24,319
media for that and and especially

1224
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,680
fiction because

1225
00:41:24,319 --> 00:41:27,040
if you read a book it's always about the

1226
00:41:25,680 --> 00:41:28,480
main character if you look at a movie

1227
00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:30,079
it's always about the main character if

1228
00:41:28,480 --> 00:41:32,319
you play a game you're always the main

1229
00:41:30,079 --> 00:41:34,160
character we always identify with the

1230
00:41:32,319 --> 00:41:37,599
main character

1231
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:39,119
and so people step towards a

1232
00:41:37,599 --> 00:41:42,319
indie game and they think oh we're

1233
00:41:39,119 --> 00:41:44,319
creating a story i'm the main character

1234
00:41:42,319 --> 00:41:45,119
you're not the main character the group

1235
00:41:44,319 --> 00:41:48,000
is

1236
00:41:45,119 --> 00:41:49,359
yeah it's a very weird way of thinking

1237
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:51,280
but to me personally it's the correct

1238
00:41:49,359 --> 00:41:52,560
way the group is the main character and

1239
00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:53,839
sometimes the story will be a little bit

1240
00:41:52,560 --> 00:41:55,680
more about you and sometimes it'll be a

1241
00:41:53,839 --> 00:41:56,560
little bit more about anyone else but

1242
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,880
yeah

1243
00:41:56,560 --> 00:42:00,960
it doesn't add any less value to you or

1244
00:41:58,880 --> 00:42:02,880
your character if someone else is taking

1245
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:05,760
control for a minute

1246
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:07,839
and actually it adds value to it because

1247
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:09,119
it will show the way you can connect

1248
00:42:07,839 --> 00:42:11,440
with each other

1249
00:42:09,119 --> 00:42:12,880
as characters and as people

1250
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:14,480
and and that's what i mean with that

1251
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:16,319
shared open space

1252
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:17,760
the more we talk out of character with

1253
00:42:16,319 --> 00:42:19,359
each other the more we know about each

1254
00:42:17,760 --> 00:42:21,119
other more friends we can become and the

1255
00:42:19,359 --> 00:42:23,359
better we can play but the more we know

1256
00:42:21,119 --> 00:42:25,040
about each other in character

1257
00:42:23,359 --> 00:42:26,800
also gives us connections to each other

1258
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:28,480
and will make us less reluctant to give

1259
00:42:26,800 --> 00:42:30,480
up that spotlight because we know we can

1260
00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:31,920
trust a person the other person with

1261
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:34,960
that spotlight they're not going to

1262
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:37,920
abuse it and we're going to get it back

1263
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:39,920
yep precisely which is why i do count my

1264
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:41,440
blessings in that i'm obviously very

1265
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:43,599
familiar with

1266
00:42:41,440 --> 00:42:44,960
my players and in fact three of them

1267
00:42:43,599 --> 00:42:47,520
come around

1268
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:49,359
every other week for board game night so

1269
00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:51,280
we have time we have a lot of time then

1270
00:42:49,359 --> 00:42:54,960
and it's very good

1271
00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:56,240
you know espionage time for me to get a

1272
00:42:54,960 --> 00:42:57,599
temperature reading on how they're

1273
00:42:56,240 --> 00:43:00,880
feeling about the campaign and various

1274
00:42:57,599 --> 00:43:02,079
things that are happening as a dm uh

1275
00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:04,720
but uh

1276
00:43:02,079 --> 00:43:05,920
you know i as i said i'm very lucky that

1277
00:43:04,720 --> 00:43:08,000
we have

1278
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:09,359
those connections between us i mean

1279
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:11,359
that's not to say you know it's a

1280
00:43:09,359 --> 00:43:12,880
perfect game obviously by any stretch

1281
00:43:11,359 --> 00:43:13,760
because that doesn't exist no game is

1282
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,760
perfect

1283
00:43:13,760 --> 00:43:17,760
no matter how much popular media would

1284
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:19,760
maybe like you to think

1285
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:21,520
but i'm i'm really in love with this

1286
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:24,240
idea that we've had of

1287
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:28,400
considering the quote-unquote the group

1288
00:43:24,240 --> 00:43:30,800
as its own entity that needs to be

1289
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:34,560
fed and watered and needs to be

1290
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:37,440
you know catered for and considered and

1291
00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:39,040
perhaps it's an experience thing for me

1292
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:40,560
all the the kind of classes that i've

1293
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:41,920
played but i

1294
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:44,000
have a wizard

1295
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:46,160
uh i think my level 10 or 11 and now in

1296
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:48,400
another campaign and for wizards it's

1297
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:50,319
very easy to

1298
00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:51,839
to try and steal that spotlight in any

1299
00:43:50,319 --> 00:43:53,760
given situation because of their

1300
00:43:51,839 --> 00:43:56,400
versatility because of the breadth of

1301
00:43:53,760 --> 00:43:58,160
the spells available to them

1302
00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:59,839
even in combat because you're so squishy

1303
00:43:58,160 --> 00:44:01,839
you can very quickly become

1304
00:43:59,839 --> 00:44:03,440
the victim who needs saving which is a

1305
00:44:01,839 --> 00:44:04,960
main character again

1306
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:07,839
um so that

1307
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:10,160
is actually quite a good exercise for

1308
00:44:07,839 --> 00:44:11,680
learning those social cues and learning

1309
00:44:10,160 --> 00:44:13,839
when to be like

1310
00:44:11,680 --> 00:44:15,760
i could trivialize this encounter entire

1311
00:44:13,839 --> 00:44:16,880
encounter with one spell but let me you

1312
00:44:15,760 --> 00:44:18,000
know

1313
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:19,680
let me just see how it's going to play

1314
00:44:18,000 --> 00:44:22,560
out for a little bit or

1315
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:23,680
all this that and the other and what i

1316
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:26,160
love

1317
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:28,880
even more about this is that it's again

1318
00:44:26,160 --> 00:44:32,000
a perfect perfect crystal

1319
00:44:28,880 --> 00:44:33,760
clear delineation between player

1320
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:36,240
and character and it's

1321
00:44:33,760 --> 00:44:39,200
how you open the show was with that

1322
00:44:36,240 --> 00:44:41,280
player dynamics and then party dynamics

1323
00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:42,400
and this is this is one way where they

1324
00:44:41,280 --> 00:44:44,079
are so

1325
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:45,839
so different

1326
00:44:44,079 --> 00:44:47,440
is is that the player always has that

1327
00:44:45,839 --> 00:44:49,359
choice to shine that spotlight on

1328
00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:51,359
somebody else when

1329
00:44:49,359 --> 00:44:53,200
obviously in in quote unquote real life

1330
00:44:51,359 --> 00:44:54,880
as if fighting dragons would ever be in

1331
00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:56,800
real life but um

1332
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:58,720
you know that might not happen

1333
00:44:56,800 --> 00:45:00,560
but it's a responsibility it's a it's a

1334
00:44:58,720 --> 00:45:01,920
boon you have to be able to do that to

1335
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:02,880
other players to be like hey i you know

1336
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:04,240
i'm not going to trivialize this

1337
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:06,640
encounter because i know that guy wants

1338
00:45:04,240 --> 00:45:08,800
to talk to these guards so i'm

1339
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:10,160
let's see how i'm i'm here for the ride

1340
00:45:08,800 --> 00:45:11,280
i want to see it happen i'm not just

1341
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:12,960
going to

1342
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:15,440
sleep uh

1343
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:18,160
command because

1344
00:45:15,440 --> 00:45:20,480
i i can read the scene i can read the

1345
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:22,560
room to put it in one contrived

1346
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:24,240
platitude

1347
00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:25,920
i personally love playing wizards

1348
00:45:24,240 --> 00:45:27,280
because you talked about your tenth

1349
00:45:25,920 --> 00:45:29,119
level wizard

1350
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:30,720
i love them i don't love them because of

1351
00:45:29,119 --> 00:45:32,800
their versatility i don't love them

1352
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:34,640
because of the great spell clusters and

1353
00:45:32,800 --> 00:45:37,920
all that

1354
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:39,760
um crap excuse my fringe um

1355
00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:41,839
i don't care about that at all what i

1356
00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:44,319
love about playing a wizard is that a

1357
00:45:41,839 --> 00:45:46,240
wizard on his own is very weak

1358
00:45:44,319 --> 00:45:48,640
especially in the beginning and the

1359
00:45:46,240 --> 00:45:50,319
wizard needs friends

1360
00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:52,160
a wizard always needs friends because

1361
00:45:50,319 --> 00:45:54,000
he's he's not a meat shield he's going

1362
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:57,200
to go down very quick and he needs

1363
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:59,040
people he can trust so i never play the

1364
00:45:57,200 --> 00:46:01,599
victim with my wizard i always flip it

1365
00:45:59,040 --> 00:46:03,280
over as a wizard i

1366
00:46:01,599 --> 00:46:05,599
often take control

1367
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:08,000
but i don't control i seek friendship

1368
00:46:05,599 --> 00:46:10,640
with my wizard up later wizard um a very

1369
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:11,839
scrawny guy very nerdy guy his name was

1370
00:46:10,640 --> 00:46:14,480
jean-luc

1371
00:46:11,839 --> 00:46:16,480
so the name says it all if you're a bit

1372
00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:19,359
um towards the friends um

1373
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:21,440
build it let me see it that way um

1374
00:46:19,359 --> 00:46:22,480
and um he was a guy who never had any

1375
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:26,079
friends

1376
00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:29,280
and we played uh lost my fendelver

1377
00:46:26,079 --> 00:46:30,720
and we were all dwarfs so

1378
00:46:29,280 --> 00:46:33,200
one of the things i wanted for this

1379
00:46:30,720 --> 00:46:34,960
character at the end is to have friends

1380
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:36,960
so that meant that i had to interact

1381
00:46:34,960 --> 00:46:38,640
with all the different characters

1382
00:46:36,960 --> 00:46:41,119
to know what they were about how they

1383
00:46:38,640 --> 00:46:42,400
were and if they would be fitting to be

1384
00:46:41,119 --> 00:46:45,920
friends with

1385
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:47,760
my character and in that way doctor i

1386
00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:48,800
incorporated something into the

1387
00:46:47,760 --> 00:46:50,000
character

1388
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:50,960
that

1389
00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:53,920
made him

1390
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:56,640
kind of reliant on other people

1391
00:46:53,920 --> 00:46:58,319
and it made him

1392
00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:59,839
think about group dynamics as a

1393
00:46:58,319 --> 00:47:01,839
character and it made him

1394
00:46:59,839 --> 00:47:04,000
think about the importance of not being

1395
00:47:01,839 --> 00:47:06,720
left alone and not being a kind of party

1396
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:08,160
who whereas everyone just does what they

1397
00:47:06,720 --> 00:47:11,280
want to do

1398
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:13,839
he needed a well-structured

1399
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:16,319
and to get a working party just to

1400
00:47:13,839 --> 00:47:16,319
survive

1401
00:47:16,560 --> 00:47:20,400
and it's one of the few ways that you

1402
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:22,559
can implement that that group dynamics

1403
00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:24,480
into your party dynamics

1404
00:47:22,559 --> 00:47:27,440
you could make a rogue who's very quiet

1405
00:47:24,480 --> 00:47:29,040
who's very good at picking locks

1406
00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:31,440
but he can't talk

1407
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:34,160
at all he's not charismatic at all and

1408
00:47:31,440 --> 00:47:36,319
he will have a need

1409
00:47:34,160 --> 00:47:37,440
for someone to take that over so it

1410
00:47:36,319 --> 00:47:39,040
which will

1411
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:40,960
make him turn toward another party

1412
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:42,000
member maybe a bard who's very good at

1413
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:45,839
talking

1414
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:48,000
but the bard he's not very good at

1415
00:47:45,839 --> 00:47:50,319
wilderness survival or he doesn't have a

1416
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:52,480
lot of hit points so he will need maybe

1417
00:47:50,319 --> 00:47:53,839
some kind of meaty kind of guy who can

1418
00:47:52,480 --> 00:47:56,319
help him with that that's where you get

1419
00:47:53,839 --> 00:47:58,640
to do it and that's how i think you

1420
00:47:56,319 --> 00:48:00,640
should create party dynamics

1421
00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:02,319
what's the saying the sum of the

1422
00:48:00,640 --> 00:48:03,280
the whole is greater than the sum of its

1423
00:48:02,319 --> 00:48:07,280
parts

1424
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:08,880
yeah that's what your party should be

1425
00:48:07,280 --> 00:48:10,800
and i mean

1426
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:11,599
after me singing the praises about my

1427
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:13,200
group

1428
00:48:11,599 --> 00:48:15,440
very much that was a problem they they

1429
00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:16,079
felt for longer than i should have let

1430
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:17,839
it

1431
00:48:16,079 --> 00:48:20,480
be felt to be honest when they first

1432
00:48:17,839 --> 00:48:23,839
started playing it was very much

1433
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:26,000
six discreet character main characters

1434
00:48:23,839 --> 00:48:27,599
reluctantly being

1435
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:30,000
traveling together they were all

1436
00:48:27,599 --> 00:48:31,520
aragorns

1437
00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:33,760
yes yeah and various different

1438
00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:36,240
incarnations of the character yeah

1439
00:48:33,760 --> 00:48:39,839
the different times in his life for sure

1440
00:48:36,240 --> 00:48:41,760
um and it yeah it was very much like

1441
00:48:39,839 --> 00:48:43,280
but i i love that example you know it's

1442
00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:44,640
it's

1443
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:47,839
even if i think about my own you know my

1444
00:48:44,640 --> 00:48:50,800
core friend group we have personalities

1445
00:48:47,839 --> 00:48:53,040
and dynamics in real life and

1446
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:54,160
we used to bring something unique to the

1447
00:48:53,040 --> 00:48:56,000
table

1448
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:58,559
uh and it's

1449
00:48:56,000 --> 00:49:00,720
it i think it is that it is that main

1450
00:48:58,559 --> 00:49:02,800
character syndrome that you mentioned i

1451
00:49:00,720 --> 00:49:06,160
think makes

1452
00:49:02,800 --> 00:49:08,160
is is a filter stands in the way of

1453
00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:09,760
that train of thought for players and

1454
00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:12,160
their characters because

1455
00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:13,359
it's very easy for

1456
00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:14,960
you know maybe three onwards for a

1457
00:49:13,359 --> 00:49:17,200
wizard or whatever for most classes to

1458
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:18,400
be to at least think

1459
00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:19,760
i am

1460
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:21,200
unstoppable

1461
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:23,040
you know i am

1462
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:24,800
i could do almost everything or maybe

1463
00:49:23,040 --> 00:49:26,640
i'm not wise but

1464
00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:27,680
what does that mean whatever let's move

1465
00:49:26,640 --> 00:49:29,680
on

1466
00:49:27,680 --> 00:49:32,160
so it's it's to see the wood for the

1467
00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:34,160
trees and be like no no i need you know

1468
00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:36,000
my guy needs something

1469
00:49:34,160 --> 00:49:39,040
my character needs something or someone

1470
00:49:36,000 --> 00:49:41,760
that isn't a health potion

1471
00:49:39,040 --> 00:49:44,000
it can be quite tricky sometimes

1472
00:49:41,760 --> 00:49:46,000
when i'm about to play a

1473
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:49,920
long time campaign i ask for three

1474
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:52,559
things want need and weakness

1475
00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:54,720
once being what the character wants very

1476
00:49:52,559 --> 00:49:56,880
simple usually some kind of

1477
00:49:54,720 --> 00:49:59,599
materialistic thing

1478
00:49:56,880 --> 00:50:02,400
could be i want to have fast wealth or

1479
00:49:59,599 --> 00:50:05,119
vast knowledge or i want to find a wife

1480
00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:07,280
um and then i ask for their need and the

1481
00:50:05,119 --> 00:50:09,200
need is something in a character

1482
00:50:07,280 --> 00:50:10,640
that they don't know

1483
00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:12,800
they need it

1484
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:15,200
and they often confuse what they want

1485
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:17,760
for example um someone wants to get a

1486
00:50:15,200 --> 00:50:19,760
girlfriend but they need to

1487
00:50:17,760 --> 00:50:22,079
um

1488
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:24,240
get more confidence self-confidence to

1489
00:50:22,079 --> 00:50:26,400
actually be able to get one

1490
00:50:24,240 --> 00:50:28,480
and then i go to their weakness and ask

1491
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:31,359
them what's their weakness and to go on

1492
00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:34,800
with the given example yeah it could be

1493
00:50:31,359 --> 00:50:38,240
um i'm shy around women because i've

1494
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:40,079
never had a female figure to talk to

1495
00:50:38,240 --> 00:50:43,520
and then i'm gonna look in the party and

1496
00:50:40,079 --> 00:50:45,359
then look for someone who can actually

1497
00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:46,400
help them with that need or with that

1498
00:50:45,359 --> 00:50:49,680
weakness

1499
00:50:46,400 --> 00:50:52,000
and for example if someone has a

1500
00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:53,599
female character they're playing

1501
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:56,319
i'm going to look for situations to set

1502
00:50:53,599 --> 00:50:58,160
those two up together

1503
00:50:56,319 --> 00:51:00,079
which will make that one

1504
00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:02,240
the first person realize that that

1505
00:51:00,079 --> 00:51:05,040
character could actually work with their

1506
00:51:02,240 --> 00:51:07,599
character and actually help them

1507
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:09,760
and and maybe they'll think of the want

1508
00:51:07,599 --> 00:51:12,000
like oh this guy's looking for a wife oh

1509
00:51:09,760 --> 00:51:13,760
that's a female perfect

1510
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:15,200
i see yes and the other person will

1511
00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:16,960
think no [ __ ] way i'm going to play a

1512
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:19,200
wife

1513
00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:21,440
but in that process the character will

1514
00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:24,319
learn to talk to women

1515
00:51:21,440 --> 00:51:26,559
because they've gained a friend

1516
00:51:24,319 --> 00:51:28,400
and it's that way you can actually

1517
00:51:26,559 --> 00:51:30,480
put your players together

1518
00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:31,760
over a longer time and and make them

1519
00:51:30,480 --> 00:51:33,599
create something that's bigger than

1520
00:51:31,760 --> 00:51:36,079
themselves

1521
00:51:33,599 --> 00:51:38,640
not everybody is as socially savage in

1522
00:51:36,079 --> 00:51:40,640
it or a storytelling savage unit as you

1523
00:51:38,640 --> 00:51:42,480
might be as a dungeon master or as a gay

1524
00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:43,440
master but you can always talk with them

1525
00:51:42,480 --> 00:51:45,440
about it

1526
00:51:43,440 --> 00:51:47,040
you can sometimes tell one or two

1527
00:51:45,440 --> 00:51:49,440
players what you're planning

1528
00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:50,400
or how you're trying to toy with those

1529
00:51:49,440 --> 00:51:51,760
dynamics

1530
00:51:50,400 --> 00:51:54,000
or why they're important towards each

1531
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:57,440
other or you can have npcs tell them

1532
00:51:54,000 --> 00:51:58,960
with some kind of prophecy or whatever

1533
00:51:57,440 --> 00:52:01,440
and it's the way you play with those

1534
00:51:58,960 --> 00:52:03,440
dynamics in and out of game that will

1535
00:52:01,440 --> 00:52:05,119
create a very strong group that will

1536
00:52:03,440 --> 00:52:08,160
want to play together

1537
00:52:05,119 --> 00:52:10,400
and i try to do that as a dungeon master

1538
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:12,559
professionally and i try to give that

1539
00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:14,720
away

1540
00:52:12,559 --> 00:52:18,240
what i mean is

1541
00:52:14,720 --> 00:52:20,400
i don't want a group to be reliant on me

1542
00:52:18,240 --> 00:52:22,559
to have a great game

1543
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:24,000
so before i start a longer campaign i

1544
00:52:22,559 --> 00:52:25,680
ask the players if there's anyone who

1545
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:27,680
wants to get the um

1546
00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:29,520
who wants to be the the game master

1547
00:52:27,680 --> 00:52:32,800
afterwards after that campaign and i

1548
00:52:29,520 --> 00:52:35,599
take them behind the screen with me

1549
00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:37,760
after sessions or after a big plot point

1550
00:52:35,599 --> 00:52:40,400
and i tell them how i did it

1551
00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:41,920
because it's a social game it should be

1552
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:43,920
enjoyed socially

1553
00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:45,280
it's not something for me to make money

1554
00:52:43,920 --> 00:52:47,359
out of

1555
00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:48,960
i don't want them rely on me if they

1556
00:52:47,359 --> 00:52:50,000
want to keep playing with me because

1557
00:52:48,960 --> 00:52:52,480
they

1558
00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:53,839
the certain skill set i have or

1559
00:52:52,480 --> 00:52:55,119
they just like looking at my face

1560
00:52:53,839 --> 00:52:57,119
whatever

1561
00:52:55,119 --> 00:52:58,880
then that's okay

1562
00:52:57,119 --> 00:53:00,800
but i don't want to be relying on me

1563
00:52:58,880 --> 00:53:05,119
they never should be

1564
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:05,119
teaching man to fish as they say yeah

1565
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:10,960
well thank you uh for this discussion

1566
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:12,400
time really has gotten away from me uh

1567
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:14,640
today

1568
00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:16,559
is there anything we haven't yet talked

1569
00:53:14,640 --> 00:53:18,960
about i mean for me yeah because we

1570
00:53:16,559 --> 00:53:20,319
didn't even touch like 80 of my notes um

1571
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:22,800
because we were talking about the real

1572
00:53:20,319 --> 00:53:24,480
juicy bit the the really important juicy

1573
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,480
bit so i'm much

1574
00:53:24,480 --> 00:53:28,640
i'm super happy with that but uh for

1575
00:53:26,480 --> 00:53:31,200
yourself which i think we haven't really

1576
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:32,800
touched upon yet well i think we have

1577
00:53:31,200 --> 00:53:34,160
the better part of my notes have been

1578
00:53:32,800 --> 00:53:36,480
discussed

1579
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:38,800
but we don't do this quite often so if

1580
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:40,880
there's anything you want to ask me

1581
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:42,720
get any information out of me just go

1582
00:53:40,880 --> 00:53:44,160
ahead and ask me

1583
00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:47,119
okay well i did have one question that i

1584
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:50,480
was sitting on for since the beginning

1585
00:53:47,119 --> 00:53:52,160
uh but now is a good time as any

1586
00:53:50,480 --> 00:53:53,599
it was mainly i think you mentioned

1587
00:53:52,160 --> 00:53:56,720
earlier on about

1588
00:53:53,599 --> 00:53:57,920
kind of making a effort to

1589
00:53:56,720 --> 00:54:00,160
you know read the players listen to the

1590
00:53:57,920 --> 00:54:01,280
players understand how their

1591
00:54:00,160 --> 00:54:03,599
their

1592
00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:04,800
the role that was it was up the role

1593
00:54:03,599 --> 00:54:06,640
within

1594
00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:09,040
the group

1595
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:11,440
and my question was is that

1596
00:54:09,040 --> 00:54:13,040
are you doing are you actively doing

1597
00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:15,200
that as like a you know subroutine in

1598
00:54:13,040 --> 00:54:17,280
your brain when you're running a game

1599
00:54:15,200 --> 00:54:18,720
are you actively making a cognitive

1600
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:21,119
effort to be like

1601
00:54:18,720 --> 00:54:22,800
oh the foolish army will remember this

1602
00:54:21,119 --> 00:54:24,720
when when somebody kind of steps forward

1603
00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:26,800
and makes a decision is that

1604
00:54:24,720 --> 00:54:28,960
something you're actively doing

1605
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:30,640
yeah i do um

1606
00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:33,280
but it comes very easy to me if i'm

1607
00:54:30,640 --> 00:54:34,960
honest it's something i always do when

1608
00:54:33,280 --> 00:54:37,760
whenever i'm at parties as well or just

1609
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:40,160
having drinks with friends

1610
00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:42,000
i like to have everyone included into it

1611
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:44,240
and it i think it's part of

1612
00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:46,480
why i'm a social worker and

1613
00:54:44,240 --> 00:54:47,839
being a social worker has only made it

1614
00:54:46,480 --> 00:54:50,000
stronger

1615
00:54:47,839 --> 00:54:51,520
but i will look at my place and i will

1616
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:53,280
think about especially if it's new

1617
00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:55,760
players or a party that has been

1618
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:57,599
pre-made about your group dynamics and

1619
00:54:55,760 --> 00:54:59,760
um

1620
00:54:57,599 --> 00:55:01,119
i will ask some sometimes just one

1621
00:54:59,760 --> 00:55:03,359
specific player what do you think about

1622
00:55:01,119 --> 00:55:05,440
this or what do you think about that and

1623
00:55:03,359 --> 00:55:07,680
there's one thing that's even

1624
00:55:05,440 --> 00:55:10,720
stronger than asking them

1625
00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:13,200
um and that's one of the things i do and

1626
00:55:10,720 --> 00:55:14,799
it's called um

1627
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:17,680
i think you would translate it in

1628
00:55:14,799 --> 00:55:21,960
english as uh derose of leery uh lee

1629
00:55:17,680 --> 00:55:21,960
rewritten as uh l-e-a-r-y

1630
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:25,200
okay and it takes it

1631
00:55:24,040 --> 00:55:28,240
[Music]

1632
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:30,559
it's kind of a diagram a circle where

1633
00:55:28,240 --> 00:55:32,880
the way people connect

1634
00:55:30,559 --> 00:55:34,880
for example

1635
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:36,559
you can be um

1636
00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:37,680
it's not about being happy or depressed

1637
00:55:36,559 --> 00:55:40,160
or being

1638
00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:41,680
angry or anything like that it's more

1639
00:55:40,160 --> 00:55:43,680
like

1640
00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:45,680
uh people who are instigators who will

1641
00:55:43,680 --> 00:55:49,760
easily take the first step or people who

1642
00:55:45,680 --> 00:55:51,839
are more reluctant or reliant on others

1643
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,720
and one of the things it says is that we

1644
00:55:51,839 --> 00:55:54,400
can

1645
00:55:52,720 --> 00:55:56,559
actually

1646
00:55:54,400 --> 00:55:58,000
make other people behave

1647
00:55:56,559 --> 00:56:00,880
when we start mirroring their own

1648
00:55:58,000 --> 00:56:03,680
behavior so if you're a player in my

1649
00:56:00,880 --> 00:56:06,799
group who rather waits for the others to

1650
00:56:03,680 --> 00:56:08,319
take control then i as a player in that

1651
00:56:06,799 --> 00:56:10,240
game for example

1652
00:56:08,319 --> 00:56:12,240
will stop taking that control

1653
00:56:10,240 --> 00:56:14,400
and i'm not giving you

1654
00:56:12,240 --> 00:56:16,480
exactly the spotlight but i'm giving you

1655
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:19,280
the opportunity to take it

1656
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:21,040
and often people will tend towards

1657
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:21,839
doing the exact opposite of what you're

1658
00:56:21,040 --> 00:56:23,839
doing

1659
00:56:21,839 --> 00:56:25,920
at that moment so if i'm the one who

1660
00:56:23,839 --> 00:56:28,960
keeps giving in a relationship i could

1661
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:31,520
stop giving so i could receive

1662
00:56:28,960 --> 00:56:33,280
it's a real kind of manipulation

1663
00:56:31,520 --> 00:56:36,400
but it's actually an honest one

1664
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:38,480
because we're talking about dynamics

1665
00:56:36,400 --> 00:56:40,240
and how we look towards each other

1666
00:56:38,480 --> 00:56:41,680
it's for example when you have a friend

1667
00:56:40,240 --> 00:56:44,079
who keeps talking

1668
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:45,839
um or who never talks and you're always

1669
00:56:44,079 --> 00:56:47,280
the one talking

1670
00:56:45,839 --> 00:56:48,960
if you want that other person to talk

1671
00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:50,559
because you're generally interested in

1672
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:52,240
what you're saying

1673
00:56:50,559 --> 00:56:54,240
you just want to know how their day was

1674
00:56:52,240 --> 00:56:55,680
but they don't tend to talk

1675
00:56:54,240 --> 00:56:56,880
you could try to just

1676
00:56:55,680 --> 00:56:59,440
be

1677
00:56:56,880 --> 00:57:00,880
a little bit more quiet and just ask

1678
00:56:59,440 --> 00:57:02,079
them how to tables

1679
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:03,359
we're not pushing them into the

1680
00:57:02,079 --> 00:57:04,960
spotlight we're giving them an

1681
00:57:03,359 --> 00:57:06,960
opportunity to seize it

1682
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:08,559
and i think that's very important

1683
00:57:06,960 --> 00:57:11,040
we're not giving anyone the spotlight

1684
00:57:08,559 --> 00:57:12,880
i'm not telling someone to do something

1685
00:57:11,040 --> 00:57:14,559
i'm just giving them the opportunity to

1686
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:16,079
and it's very easily

1687
00:57:14,559 --> 00:57:17,520
done in a game

1688
00:57:16,079 --> 00:57:19,839
when you go

1689
00:57:17,520 --> 00:57:21,680
to talk with

1690
00:57:19,839 --> 00:57:23,440
going to talk with a guard it's kind of

1691
00:57:21,680 --> 00:57:24,960
social interaction and you're usually

1692
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:26,240
the one doing the social interaction but

1693
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:27,440
you know there's a friend who's a little

1694
00:57:26,240 --> 00:57:29,440
bit

1695
00:57:27,440 --> 00:57:30,640
shy but he could actually his character

1696
00:57:29,440 --> 00:57:32,160
could do it as well because he's a

1697
00:57:30,640 --> 00:57:33,920
soldier so he's charismatic but he

1698
00:57:32,160 --> 00:57:35,280
doesn't play that part of social yeah

1699
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:37,760
you can just go before the encounter you

1700
00:57:35,280 --> 00:57:40,079
can my character turns his head my head

1701
00:57:37,760 --> 00:57:42,160
my character turns his head towards

1702
00:57:40,079 --> 00:57:44,160
person x and asks

1703
00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:47,119
do you want to take this one do you want

1704
00:57:44,160 --> 00:57:48,880
to try talking yeah and it's easily done

1705
00:57:47,119 --> 00:57:50,799
it's it's it's kind of mirroring that

1706
00:57:48,880 --> 00:57:52,799
behavior and giving or giving the

1707
00:57:50,799 --> 00:57:54,720
opportunity to seize that spotlight and

1708
00:57:52,799 --> 00:57:56,640
not pushing the minute

1709
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:58,720
yep giving the opportunity rather than

1710
00:57:56,640 --> 00:58:00,400
pushing them in subtle but a very

1711
00:57:58,720 --> 00:58:01,599
important difference

1712
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:04,319
there

1713
00:58:01,599 --> 00:58:05,920
well uh thank you ever so much for that

1714
00:58:04,319 --> 00:58:08,400
discussion today

1715
00:58:05,920 --> 00:58:09,839
is there anything you would like to

1716
00:58:08,400 --> 00:58:12,480
promote

1717
00:58:09,839 --> 00:58:14,319
um not really right now we're working on

1718
00:58:12,480 --> 00:58:15,680
the website so

1719
00:58:14,319 --> 00:58:18,160
it's a little bit bits and pieces

1720
00:58:15,680 --> 00:58:20,880
everywhere right now um i don't have any

1721
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:23,920
book coming up but if anyone has any

1722
00:58:20,880 --> 00:58:25,520
questions about what i'm talking or just

1723
00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:27,280
needs some advice or some help or

1724
00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:30,480
whatever or

1725
00:58:27,280 --> 00:58:32,880
you think about something i've said and

1726
00:58:30,480 --> 00:58:34,839
you don't think it's right please

1727
00:58:32,880 --> 00:58:38,079
contact me through instagram through

1728
00:58:34,839 --> 00:58:40,480
facebook at full swami or at fluid swami

1729
00:58:38,079 --> 00:58:42,720
dm depending on where you're sitting

1730
00:58:40,480 --> 00:58:45,440
and i'm always open for for a discussion

1731
00:58:42,720 --> 00:58:47,839
with anyone so

1732
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:49,599
feel free to contact me i'll be dropping

1733
00:58:47,839 --> 00:58:52,480
you loads of messages after this all the

1734
00:58:49,599 --> 00:58:53,119
things i disagree with uh

1735
00:58:52,480 --> 00:58:54,000
no

1736
00:58:53,119 --> 00:58:55,839
um

1737
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:57,280
i do remind me that i think you were

1738
00:58:55,839 --> 00:58:59,119
working on a book before which was in

1739
00:58:57,280 --> 00:59:02,319
the episode description last time

1740
00:58:59,119 --> 00:59:03,920
so um i had a name of him though yes

1741
00:59:02,319 --> 00:59:05,359
yes so that will come in that will go in

1742
00:59:03,920 --> 00:59:08,160
that will go in this episode description

1743
00:59:05,359 --> 00:59:10,480
for those uh for those newer listeners i

1744
00:59:08,160 --> 00:59:11,680
think by now it's a bronze bestseller on

1745
00:59:10,480 --> 00:59:12,880
the master skills

1746
00:59:11,680 --> 00:59:15,839
you're being too modest at this

1747
00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:19,440
promotional stage

1748
00:59:15,839 --> 00:59:21,280
so it's been sold a few times

1749
00:59:19,440 --> 00:59:23,359
no we're very happy with it and i hope

1750
00:59:21,280 --> 00:59:24,960
other people are as well yeah yeah well

1751
00:59:23,359 --> 00:59:26,960
that will be in the episode description

1752
00:59:24,960 --> 00:59:30,720
so i would encourage you all listening

1753
00:59:26,960 --> 00:59:32,640
to go and check that out uh and as as uh

1754
00:59:30,720 --> 00:59:34,640
you mentioned it's um

1755
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:36,160
he is obviously open for chatting this

1756
00:59:34,640 --> 00:59:38,079
being the second time on the show so i

1757
00:59:36,160 --> 00:59:40,079
would encourage you to do so so all

1758
00:59:38,079 --> 00:59:40,880
that's left to say well there's one last

1759
00:59:40,079 --> 00:59:42,880
time

1760
00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:45,599
thank you ever so much for joining us

1761
00:59:42,880 --> 00:59:47,280
today and sharing your your expertise

1762
00:59:45,599 --> 00:59:50,079
and experience on this

1763
00:59:47,280 --> 00:59:52,160
rather abstract topic thank you very

1764
00:59:50,079 --> 00:59:55,599
much for having me and for

1765
00:59:52,160 --> 00:59:57,040
having this very nice chat

1766
00:59:55,599 --> 00:59:58,480
lovely little evening

1767
00:59:57,040 --> 01:00:00,400
evening over i feel like i could have

1768
00:59:58,480 --> 01:00:02,319
done with a glass a glass of wine or a

1769
01:00:00,400 --> 01:00:04,880
glass of port or something over tonight

1770
01:00:02,319 --> 01:00:07,760
tonight's discussion uh next time the

1771
01:00:04,880 --> 01:00:07,760
third time's a charm

1772
01:00:07,839 --> 01:00:11,520
thank you to everybody for listening at

1773
01:00:10,480 --> 01:00:14,079
home

1774
01:00:11,520 --> 01:00:15,760
as usual please check out the episode

1775
01:00:14,079 --> 01:00:17,760
description for all the pertinent links

1776
01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:20,319
references and

1777
01:00:17,760 --> 01:00:22,000
dm's guild and instagram and and as ian

1778
01:00:20,319 --> 01:00:25,119
said please do reach out to him uh for

1779
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:27,040
any thoughts or questions and and me as

1780
01:00:25,119 --> 01:00:29,200
well i'm always open to answer questions

1781
01:00:27,040 --> 01:00:30,799
although i feel that the longer the

1782
01:00:29,200 --> 01:00:32,400
podcast goes on the fewer people want to

1783
01:00:30,799 --> 01:00:33,920
talk to me

1784
01:00:32,400 --> 01:00:37,119
but such is life

1785
01:00:33,920 --> 01:00:39,119
anyway thank you all for listening and

1786
01:00:37,119 --> 01:00:40,720
good night

1787
01:00:39,119 --> 01:00:41,680
and now it's time for the patreon shout

1788
01:00:40,720 --> 01:00:44,880
outs

1789
01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:47,760
thank you to robert hartley dm for viva

1790
01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:49,839
the dirt league and writer on the dnd

1791
01:00:47,760 --> 01:00:51,440
logic web series

1792
01:00:49,839 --> 01:00:54,240
i would encourage everybody to check him

1793
01:00:51,440 --> 01:00:55,200
out at robert hartley gm on twitter and

1794
01:00:54,240 --> 01:00:57,520
twitch

1795
01:00:55,200 --> 01:00:59,920
thank you to optional rule a two-time

1796
01:00:57,520 --> 01:01:02,720
guest of the show and a very insightful

1797
01:00:59,920 --> 01:01:04,000
and knowledgeable source of information

1798
01:01:02,720 --> 01:01:07,000
please check them out at

1799
01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:07,000
www.optionalrule.com

1800
01:01:07,440 --> 01:01:12,720
huge huge huge thank you to a great

1801
01:01:10,240 --> 01:01:15,200
friend of the show matthew perkins who's

1802
01:01:12,720 --> 01:01:17,520
out there making hilarious and

1803
01:01:15,200 --> 01:01:19,400
educational dungeons and dragons content

1804
01:01:17,520 --> 01:01:21,040
please go and check out his stuff at

1805
01:01:19,400 --> 01:01:23,440
matthewperkins.net where you can find

1806
01:01:21,040 --> 01:01:25,040
links to all of his socials and all of

1807
01:01:23,440 --> 01:01:26,720
his content including his own patreon

1808
01:01:25,040 --> 01:01:28,480
which i would very much encourage you to

1809
01:01:26,720 --> 01:01:31,359
check out

1810
01:01:28,480 --> 01:01:33,440
thank you to matt street at mpstreet88

1811
01:01:31,359 --> 01:01:34,960
on twitter for supporting the show if

1812
01:01:33,440 --> 01:01:37,559
you need support running your personal

1813
01:01:34,960 --> 01:01:39,760
or business schedule head to virtual

1814
01:01:37,559 --> 01:01:41,520
virtualtimehustle.com or on instagram to

1815
01:01:39,760 --> 01:01:43,599
make that difference between should do

1816
01:01:41,520 --> 01:01:45,359
and done boss it better with support

1817
01:01:43,599 --> 01:01:47,680
from cat who will help you get back that

1818
01:01:45,359 --> 01:01:49,119
essential time you've been searching for

1819
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:51,040
if you would like to support what we do

1820
01:01:49,119 --> 01:01:53,760
and get four shout outs a month head

1821
01:01:51,040 --> 01:01:55,280
over to patreon.com thinking critically

1822
01:01:53,760 --> 01:01:59,200
or you can just buy me a coffee at

1823
01:01:55,280 --> 01:02:04,020
kofi.com thinking critically

1824
01:01:59,200 --> 01:02:26,559
[Music]

 

Ian Maene (The FoolishSwami) Profile Photo

Ian Maene (The FoolishSwami)

Content Creator

I'm a writer and Dungeon Master who specialises in the social aspects of the game.